7 ms·

Ask HN: Have you read the Bible in its entirety, and what was your impression?

9 points by Victerius 4y ago

McLaren_Ferrari 4y ago
The themes and the vibe is very very similar to Star Wars. They are both successful because they speak to our best part and give us hope Of course the Bible is much more successful, but it also had like 100,000,000x the "marketing campaign" of Star Wars...also it was a marketing campaign at loss, whereas Star Wars had to make money for the studio.
- Minor49er 4y ago
  On the contrary, The Bible and Star Wars have very little in common with one another. You will have to stretch to draw any sort of parallel between the two
  - McLaren_Ferrari 4y ago
    What makes you say that?
    - Minor49er 4y ago
      The Bible tells a story about how man was created and deceived, then fell from God into sin which leads to death, but then was given a path to salvation by the son of God who was manifest in the flesh through virgin birth, who was martyred, but then rose again to be seated in Heaven to watch over not only mankind, but the choirs of angels above them. Star Wars is something of a coming-of-age story about a boy who understands that he has special powers that he works to refine in order to fight against a force that is trying to bring a hierarchy to the galaxy. Along the way, he befriends bigfoot, smooches his sister, and swings a laser sword.
- paulryanrogers 4y ago
  Nothing quite as hopeful as knowing the vast majority of humanity was made destined for an eternal lake of fire, and for rejecting an invisible god. Someone who must be followed and known and loved above all else, yet without any of the five senses. (OT and a few select NT witnesses notwithstanding.) And they have the balls to call non-believers the blind ones!
  - deleted 4y ago
    [deleted]
- dragonwriter 4y ago
  > The themes and the vibe is very very similar to Star Wars I’ve only seen Ep. 1-9, the Christmas special, Rogue One, Solo, and some of S1 of the Mandalorian, and read a couple of the older novels, and having read the whole of the Bible...I guess there's some weird stuff in the parts of Star Wars I missed? Is this some of the newer Disney stuff, or EU, or...?
Minor49er 4y ago
Yes. It's the most vital book that everyone should read. It's also very communal. As in, it is much more enriching to study it with others, which is why forming a church is so important. Understanding the different translations and commentaries can go far in setting context for the various books and their passages. I've actually been re-reading Luke before bed each night this past week.
- alpaca128 4y ago
  > It's the most vital book that everyone should read What makes it more vital than any other religious book? This sentence could be applied to any of them depending on where you were born.
  - KenPainter 4y ago
    I'd say the same about the Majjhima Nikaya. If I said things like that.
    - muaytimbo 4y ago
      I once said the same think about Nikki Minaj.
      - tomcam 4y ago
        Gotta be honest, I’m a little concerned about your use of the past tense. You better not have switched over to pale Nikki imitator Cardi B!
        tomcam 4y ago
        prove me wrong downvoters
  - Minor49er 4y ago
    Because it's the only one that's divinely inspired and teaches people how to get close to the one true God
paulryanrogers 4y ago
Have read several times over and lost decades and some mental health to religious dogma. It's a massive waste of time IMO. Plenty of other batshit crazy 'sacred' texts out too if that's your fancy. Don't let true believers pressure you into anything you don't want to do or not do. Their mental gymnastics and manipulation techniques are legend. Anyway, just because stuff is old doesn't mean it's true or even useful for anything except archeology. And sure may be there's a nugget of truth ("everything is meaningless") yet even a broken clock is right twice a day. Signal to noise ratio is still comparable to useful calories in a pile of manure. Get the Cliff Notes and read some critical analysis _first_ if you really cannot stay away.
- Minor49er 4y ago
  Out of curiosity, if it's such a waste of time, why did you read it from cover to cover multiple times? There was not a moment of insight or value in any of it?
  - paulryanrogers 4y ago
    Indoctrination from birth is a powerful thing. Couple that with isolation from softcore cultism and it's not trivial to break out of. Thankfully public schools with a lot of patient teachers, curiosity, and some luck broke the cycle.
waynecochran 4y ago
I first read the Bible cover to cover in grad school. I have since made it a point to read it over again in a variety of translations based on MT, LXX, DSS… I also read apocrypha, pseudepigrapha, Josephus, … investing in knowledge that steels the mind, humbles my pride, reveals the transcendent and lights a path forward. Seek and you will find.
KenPainter 4y ago
I have. Though frankly I skipped a lot of Isaiah, just couldn't choke it down. No single impression is possible. Too many authors over too many centuries, but here are a few, working backwards. Revelation. No clue. But more of Terry Pratchett's one-offs are funny if you know the references. The epistles attributed to Paul. Best way to understand USA protestants. It's the only thing they read except for the "Book of Moses" which has rules they like. But to answer your question I found them to be incomprehensible. Either Paul was a lousy writer, he was confused, or both. Compared to the other books it's hard to discern a clear thesis, perhaps because they were intended as advice to various churches that had problems but are treated as holy writ. The book of James. IMHO the most beatiful in the collection. Worth the purchase price of the entire collection. Fun fact: AA was originally going to call themselves the St James club due to this book's very practical presentation of spiritual ideas. Other epistles: no impression. The four gospels and Acts of the Apostles. I can't add to the centuries of back and forth. But they are worth a thorough reading if you are curious. I don't regret the effort I put in. Macaques. Fascinating to a student of history as it contains correspondence with regional powers such as Rome. Minor prophets. No impression. Major prophets. Isaiah and Jeremiah are the most fascinating theology I've ever read, more the enjoyable if you prep by reading "The Prophets" by Heschel. These two interpret the laws of Moses by discerning its underlying assumptions, drawing out an incredible view of what a faith could be. Example: Isaiah lays out his thesis clearly that God is disgusted with the leaders of the nation for exploiting "the widow and orphan", and for "joining house to house" (wealth accumulation) . He says he does not want them worshiping him because they stink like manure. But then he says "let us reason together! Stop oppressing the widow and the orphan..." liberal balderdash! Is that really in the Bible? Ezekiel is a pornographic ridiculing of the Israelite kings attempts to form alliances. Daniel is interesting and is the source of Jesus's self referential term "son of man", a figure in Daniel's vision who was given all authority over heaven and earth by the "ancient of days." So there is your claim that Jesus claimed to be divine. Interesting fact: give or take a century, the major prophets and their development of a philosophical underpinning of the law of Moses were coincidental with the founding of Buddhism, Janism and zoroastrianism. Makes you wonder what everybody was drinking. history beginning with Solomon: it seems to me most people miss the point of these books. They are often interpreted as tribal inasmuch as the kings are condemned for taking pagan brides and worshiped "the Baals". But the actual problem was that the locals believed in human sacrifice, specifically their own children, who were made to "pass through fire". This practice was finally wiped out by the Romans when they destroyed Carthage, a Phoenician colony. Solomon is said to have had 300 concubines and 700 wives. Everybody seems to miss the obvious point here. 700 women with legal rights? More than the number of concubines? WTF? Point is, every two bit warlord within a few hundred miles was Solomons farther-in-law. Made him the fe facto arbiter of all disputes. History of David. One right fit bastard. When he was old and unresponsive they put a young maiden in bed with him (figure maybe 14-16 years old). When he didn't touch her they said "the king is surely going to die." He did. Worth reading if only to see the development of the idea of absolute kingship in an individual and how he played it. Also fascinating as it contains the first example in the collection of speaking truth to power and living to tell the tale. Story of Saul, first king. You've read this much, why not? . Ditto for everything back to the book of Moses. Book of Moses, books 2 to 5, where all the laws are. Best read as a constitution for a self sustaining loosely organized culture that will eventually face resurgent regional powers in Egypt and Mesopotamia. My impression is that the laws are examples to give a flavor to how the population was to live. Example: "if your neighbor loses his crops, don't be a dueschebag and try to steal his land with a predatory loan he can't pay back." See notes above on Jeremiah and Isaiah. Guess which law is repeated the most often? Taking a day off every 7 days. Genesis. Best read with some modern neutral analysis that explains cool stuff like Cain and Abel are an allegory to the rise of farming over herding, reinforced by the later story that Esau, a hairy gruff game hunter, is portrayed as having no value. Hunters and gatherers are so late Paleolithic. Creation. Best understood as a thesis statement (similar to the Digha Nikaya #1 of Buddhism being a thesis statement) which I believe would have received an A+ from Aristotle for its systematic depiction of all that was visible to the human eye, using such depiction to deliver the two main theses: a single city created it all, and said deity was certain everybody, even farm animals, got to have a day off every 7 days. You asked
Mountain_Skies 4y ago
If your interest in the Bible mainly as a way of understanding Christian thinking and not as a text that's sacred to you, 'God Is Disappointed in You' is a good, easy to read, version. If you hold the Bible to be sacred to your spiritual beliefs, you might find it offensive or even blasphemous, but otherwise it is an easily accessible overview of each book of the Bible.
- Minor49er 4y ago
  I read a preview page on this. One part had the following: > When the Jews arrived at the Promised Land, they were a little irked to find the place overrun with pagans. The Promised Land was populated by many different tribes, each with their own unique culture and way of life. There were the Canaanites, the Amorites, the Girgashites… for our purposes, let’s call them "Indians." > Whenever the Jews won a battle against the Indians, God ordered them to celebrate by killing all the men, women and children. He also ordered them to kill their cattle and their sheep and throw all their belongings into a bonfire, as if the Indians never existed. So it was sort of like, "You know, maybe we really discover the Olive Garden." This seems like comedy for people who don't have any knowledge about The Bible. I certainly wouldn't say that this kind of writing is any sort of way to understand Christian thinking at all
  - ThePrankster 4y ago
    Well, if the Bible was written from the POV of anyone other than the Jews, it would definitely sound like that. Basically just a glorified, religiously-justified massacre of cultures, peoples and ideas for thousands of years.

9 points by Victerius 4y ago

The themes and the vibe is very very similar to Star Wars. They are both successful because they speak to our best part and give us hope Of course the Bible is much more successful, but it also had like 100,000,000x the "marketing campaign" of Star Wars...also it was a marketing campaign at loss, whereas Star Wars had to make money for the studio.

Minor49er 4y ago
On the contrary, The Bible and Star Wars have very little in common with one another. You will have to stretch to draw any sort of parallel between the two
- McLaren_Ferrari 4y ago
  What makes you say that?
  - Minor49er 4y ago
    The Bible tells a story about how man was created and deceived, then fell from God into sin which leads to death, but then was given a path to salvation by the son of God who was manifest in the flesh through virgin birth, who was martyred, but then rose again to be seated in Heaven to watch over not only mankind, but the choirs of angels above them. Star Wars is something of a coming-of-age story about a boy who understands that he has special powers that he works to refine in order to fight against a force that is trying to bring a hierarchy to the galaxy. Along the way, he befriends bigfoot, smooches his sister, and swings a laser sword.
paulryanrogers 4y ago
Nothing quite as hopeful as knowing the vast majority of humanity was made destined for an eternal lake of fire, and for rejecting an invisible god. Someone who must be followed and known and loved above all else, yet without any of the five senses. (OT and a few select NT witnesses notwithstanding.) And they have the balls to call non-believers the blind ones!
- deleted 4y ago
  [deleted]
dragonwriter 4y ago
> The themes and the vibe is very very similar to Star Wars I’ve only seen Ep. 1-9, the Christmas special, Rogue One, Solo, and some of S1 of the Mandalorian, and read a couple of the older novels, and having read the whole of the Bible...I guess there's some weird stuff in the parts of Star Wars I missed? Is this some of the newer Disney stuff, or EU, or...?

Minor49er 4y ago

Yes. It's the most vital book that everyone should read. It's also very communal. As in, it is much more enriching to study it with others, which is why forming a church is so important. Understanding the different translations and commentaries can go far in setting context for the various books and their passages. I've actually been re-reading Luke before bed each night this past week.

alpaca128 4y ago
> It's the most vital book that everyone should read What makes it more vital than any other religious book? This sentence could be applied to any of them depending on where you were born.
- KenPainter 4y ago
  I'd say the same about the Majjhima Nikaya. If I said things like that.
  - muaytimbo 4y ago
    I once said the same think about Nikki Minaj.
    - tomcam 4y ago
      Gotta be honest, I’m a little concerned about your use of the past tense. You better not have switched over to pale Nikki imitator Cardi B!
      - tomcam 4y ago
        prove me wrong downvoters
- Minor49er 4y ago
  Because it's the only one that's divinely inspired and teaches people how to get close to the one true God

paulryanrogers 4y ago

Have read several times over and lost decades and some mental health to religious dogma. It's a massive waste of time IMO. Plenty of other batshit crazy 'sacred' texts out too if that's your fancy. Don't let true believers pressure you into anything you don't want to do or not do. Their mental gymnastics and manipulation techniques are legend. Anyway, just because stuff is old doesn't mean it's true or even useful for anything except archeology. And sure may be there's a nugget of truth ("everything is meaningless") yet even a broken clock is right twice a day. Signal to noise ratio is still comparable to useful calories in a pile of manure. Get the Cliff Notes and read some critical analysis _first_ if you really cannot stay away.

Minor49er 4y ago
Out of curiosity, if it's such a waste of time, why did you read it from cover to cover multiple times? There was not a moment of insight or value in any of it?
- paulryanrogers 4y ago
  Indoctrination from birth is a powerful thing. Couple that with isolation from softcore cultism and it's not trivial to break out of. Thankfully public schools with a lot of patient teachers, curiosity, and some luck broke the cycle.

waynecochran 4y ago

I first read the Bible cover to cover in grad school. I have since made it a point to read it over again in a variety of translations based on MT, LXX, DSS… I also read apocrypha, pseudepigrapha, Josephus, … investing in knowledge that steels the mind, humbles my pride, reveals the transcendent and lights a path forward. Seek and you will find.

KenPainter 4y ago

I have. Though frankly I skipped a lot of Isaiah, just couldn't choke it down. No single impression is possible. Too many authors over too many centuries, but here are a few, working backwards. Revelation. No clue. But more of Terry Pratchett's one-offs are funny if you know the references. The epistles attributed to Paul. Best way to understand USA protestants. It's the only thing they read except for the "Book of Moses" which has rules they like. But to answer your question I found them to be incomprehensible. Either Paul was a lousy writer, he was confused, or both. Compared to the other books it's hard to discern a clear thesis, perhaps because they were intended as advice to various churches that had problems but are treated as holy writ. The book of James. IMHO the most beatiful in the collection. Worth the purchase price of the entire collection. Fun fact: AA was originally going to call themselves the St James club due to this book's very practical presentation of spiritual ideas. Other epistles: no impression. The four gospels and Acts of the Apostles. I can't add to the centuries of back and forth. But they are worth a thorough reading if you are curious. I don't regret the effort I put in. Macaques. Fascinating to a student of history as it contains correspondence with regional powers such as Rome. Minor prophets. No impression. Major prophets. Isaiah and Jeremiah are the most fascinating theology I've ever read, more the enjoyable if you prep by reading "The Prophets" by Heschel. These two interpret the laws of Moses by discerning its underlying assumptions, drawing out an incredible view of what a faith could be. Example: Isaiah lays out his thesis clearly that God is disgusted with the leaders of the nation for exploiting "the widow and orphan", and for "joining house to house" (wealth accumulation) . He says he does not want them worshiping him because they stink like manure. But then he says "let us reason together! Stop oppressing the widow and the orphan..." liberal balderdash! Is that really in the Bible? Ezekiel is a pornographic ridiculing of the Israelite kings attempts to form alliances. Daniel is interesting and is the source of Jesus's self referential term "son of man", a figure in Daniel's vision who was given all authority over heaven and earth by the "ancient of days." So there is your claim that Jesus claimed to be divine. Interesting fact: give or take a century, the major prophets and their development of a philosophical underpinning of the law of Moses were coincidental with the founding of Buddhism, Janism and zoroastrianism. Makes you wonder what everybody was drinking. history beginning with Solomon: it seems to me most people miss the point of these books. They are often interpreted as tribal inasmuch as the kings are condemned for taking pagan brides and worshiped "the Baals". But the actual problem was that the locals believed in human sacrifice, specifically their own children, who were made to "pass through fire". This practice was finally wiped out by the Romans when they destroyed Carthage, a Phoenician colony. Solomon is said to have had 300 concubines and 700 wives. Everybody seems to miss the obvious point here. 700 women with legal rights? More than the number of concubines? WTF? Point is, every two bit warlord within a few hundred miles was Solomons farther-in-law. Made him the fe facto arbiter of all disputes. History of David. One right fit bastard. When he was old and unresponsive they put a young maiden in bed with him (figure maybe 14-16 years old). When he didn't touch her they said "the king is surely going to die." He did. Worth reading if only to see the development of the idea of absolute kingship in an individual and how he played it. Also fascinating as it contains the first example in the collection of speaking truth to power and living to tell the tale. Story of Saul, first king. You've read this much, why not? . Ditto for everything back to the book of Moses. Book of Moses, books 2 to 5, where all the laws are. Best read as a constitution for a self sustaining loosely organized culture that will eventually face resurgent regional powers in Egypt and Mesopotamia. My impression is that the laws are examples to give a flavor to how the population was to live. Example: "if your neighbor loses his crops, don't be a dueschebag and try to steal his land with a predatory loan he can't pay back." See notes above on Jeremiah and Isaiah. Guess which law is repeated the most often? Taking a day off every 7 days. Genesis. Best read with some modern neutral analysis that explains cool stuff like Cain and Abel are an allegory to the rise of farming over herding, reinforced by the later story that Esau, a hairy gruff game hunter, is portrayed as having no value. Hunters and gatherers are so late Paleolithic. Creation. Best understood as a thesis statement (similar to the Digha Nikaya #1 of Buddhism being a thesis statement) which I believe would have received an A+ from Aristotle for its systematic depiction of all that was visible to the human eye, using such depiction to deliver the two main theses: a single city created it all, and said deity was certain everybody, even farm animals, got to have a day off every 7 days. You asked

Mountain_Skies 4y ago

If your interest in the Bible mainly as a way of understanding Christian thinking and not as a text that's sacred to you, 'God Is Disappointed in You' is a good, easy to read, version. If you hold the Bible to be sacred to your spiritual beliefs, you might find it offensive or even blasphemous, but otherwise it is an easily accessible overview of each book of the Bible.

Minor49er 4y ago
I read a preview page on this. One part had the following: > When the Jews arrived at the Promised Land, they were a little irked to find the place overrun with pagans. The Promised Land was populated by many different tribes, each with their own unique culture and way of life. There were the Canaanites, the Amorites, the Girgashites… for our purposes, let’s call them "Indians." > Whenever the Jews won a battle against the Indians, God ordered them to celebrate by killing all the men, women and children. He also ordered them to kill their cattle and their sheep and throw all their belongings into a bonfire, as if the Indians never existed. So it was sort of like, "You know, maybe we really discover the Olive Garden." This seems like comedy for people who don't have any knowledge about The Bible. I certainly wouldn't say that this kind of writing is any sort of way to understand Christian thinking at all
- ThePrankster 4y ago
  Well, if the Bible was written from the POV of anyone other than the Jews, it would definitely sound like that. Basically just a glorified, religiously-justified massacre of cultures, peoples and ideas for thousands of years.