I was always under the impression that part of growing up was realizing that everyone in high school was going through their own pain, felt isolated, reacted to

I was always under the impression that part of growing up was realizing that everyone in high school was going through their own pain, felt isolated, reacted to this in a variety of ways (some focused on hurting others, some focused on wallowing in their own hurt) and that we've all done shitty things (most of which we probably don't even realize we did) and had shitty things done to us. Realizing that my pain didn't make me special and wasn't, in fact, unique to me was precisely where I divide being a teenager from being an adult. I was beat up as a teenager (and of course teased etc) and can't for the life of me imagine holding a grudge about this into adulthood. It's not even clear the bully "sliding into the author's dms" is even aware that they were a bully. I have a distinct feeling that plenty of people I thought were being assholes to me as a teenager never really realized the extent they were giving this impression. Teenagers tend to both take things harder than they should and at the same time express themselves potentially far more aggressively than they realized. But the article has made me realize that a surprising number of people apparently never make it all the way to this stage of life.