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> There are way worse things for your mental health than habitual physical activity. I'd bet half the people here would benefit from a good tunnel project. In

by lucumo 5y ago

> There are way worse things for your mental health than habitual physical activity. I'd bet half the people here would benefit from a good tunnel project. In the update[1] he says it's calming and makes him feel safe. He's happier after doing it. It doesn't sound so bad. I mean, it's gotta be healthier than so called idle games, and about as useful. Or similar to lifting weights or jogging or something. It makes him feel good, that's all the justification any non-harmful activity should need. [1] Mods removed it on Reddit. Archive.org: http://web.archive.org/web/20220417170609/https://old.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/comments/u5rbjo/update_how_can_i27f_get_my_boyfriend31m_of_two/ http://web.archive.org/web/20220417170609/https://old.reddit...

Adraghast 5y ago
> In the update[1] he says it's calming and makes him feel safe. He's happier after doing it. That makes it more concerning, not less. A quirky hobby stops being quirky when it starts filling a psychological need. Fast forward three months and dude might not want to ever leave his tunnel. Why would he? He feels calm and safe there.
- recursive 5y ago
  If it's concerning to you to fill a need with a hobby, then you're probably going to be concerned about most people. What would you say are healthy reasons to engage in a hobby, if there are any?
  - Adraghast 5y ago
    I’d say any of the top three levels of Maslow’s hierarchy. A hobby that helps you achieve feelings of self-actualization, esteem, and belonging is great. Things get hairy at that second level. If you feel psychologically unsafe in your day-to-day life, there’s something wrong - either with your environment or the way you perceive it - that a tunnel can’t fix.
- chmod775 5y ago
  I feel calm and safe reading books. Would you recommend me to stop?
- rhizome 5y ago
  Though I'd call it "desire," what hobby doesn't fill a psychological need?

by lucumo 5y ago

Adraghast 5y ago

> In the update[1] he says it's calming and makes him feel safe. He's happier after doing it. That makes it more concerning, not less. A quirky hobby stops being quirky when it starts filling a psychological need. Fast forward three months and dude might not want to ever leave his tunnel. Why would he? He feels calm and safe there.

recursive 5y ago
If it's concerning to you to fill a need with a hobby, then you're probably going to be concerned about most people. What would you say are healthy reasons to engage in a hobby, if there are any?
- Adraghast 5y ago
  I’d say any of the top three levels of Maslow’s hierarchy. A hobby that helps you achieve feelings of self-actualization, esteem, and belonging is great. Things get hairy at that second level. If you feel psychologically unsafe in your day-to-day life, there’s something wrong - either with your environment or the way you perceive it - that a tunnel can’t fix.
chmod775 5y ago
I feel calm and safe reading books. Would you recommend me to stop?
rhizome 5y ago
Though I'd call it "desire," what hobby doesn't fill a psychological need?