This might sound harsh, but hear me out. Suicide? Come on. Really now. You can't pay some bills and are feeling lost so you want to KILL yourself? Everyone ma

This might sound harsh, but hear me out. Suicide? Come on. Really now. You can't pay some bills and are feeling lost so you want to KILL yourself? Everyone makes mistakes. Some of them feel "stupid" in retrospect, but none of them should instill regret. You are 20 years old. You have BARELY begun to live. I speak from the RIPE old age of 29 and have experienced SO much in just the last 10 years. When I was 20 years old, I was just about to drop out of college. I had a full ride to a private university. I just had to maintain my grades. However, I was sheltered as I grew up and was not prepared for the freedom of being able to make my own decisions. Instead of studying, completing homework and preparing for exams for a heavy 18 credit-hour semester; I went out drinking, partying and exercising my right of free will. Long story short....my grades nose-dived. I not only lost my full ride scholarship, but the organization who was offering it made me accountable for the 3 semester's worth of funds I had already "wasted". About midway through the third semester I was in a deep depression as I felt that my 1.8 GPA was unrecoverable to reinstate my scholarship at the rate I was currently going. I was going to screw up the biggest opportunity I had going for me in my life so far. (To be clear, this was the first and only opportunity I had in my life so far.) I felt the world was going to end. Then I made the most grown up decision I could ever make. I dropped out, moved in with my parents, got a low paying job working a call center, and started paying back my $45K in student debt and loans. I hated living with my parents.... especially when I JUST got a taste of freedom. But I learned more discipline and responsibility over the next 5 years than I did in the entire 20 years prior. (Maybe not a fair comparison, but it's true.) I STILL haven't payed back all of that debt, but I DID finally get back to school. I brought my 1.8 GPA with me. And I graduated just a year ago. Magna cum laude. (Second highest honors.) I got an internship through school which I'm still working at and making good money again. And I really think I made it this far because I took responsibility for my actions and prioritized a comeback. Life is fucking HARD! Nothing that was ever worth doing was easy. But the lessons and experiences we gain while we try to overcome our challenges are some of the most rewarding things this life will ever offer you. You were right to quit such a slave-driving position. You're suppose to be working to LIVE and not living to work. Remember that. And persevere. Life will fly by faster than you can imagine and there are still MANY experiences left to find.