4 ms·

What If We’re All Narcissists?

1 points by 4monthsaway 4y ago

brodouevencode 4y ago
> And maybe that’s okay. No, it's not okay because it leaves victims in its wake. NPD[1] can result in broken families, friendships that don't materialize, loneliness, depression, suicidality. That's not to say that you shouldn't look out for yourself, but if you're only looking out for yourself then it's basically self-imposed isolation. [1] https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Narcissistic_personality_disorder https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Narcissistic_personality_disor...
raxxorraxor 4y ago
Narcissism is a spectrum and nobody is completely free of it which every psychologist worth his salt can attest. But there is pathological narcissism and that comes at a huge cost to others and it can very well be a defense mechanism that warrants therapy. The author does sound a bit defensive here, but not in a pathological sense.
- PaulHoule 4y ago
  "Spectrum" isn't the way to put it. "Narcissism" means self-love. When you brush your teeth that's an expression of your narcissism. Everybody has "narcissism" because it is a part of your psyche the way that your heart is part of your body. Just like you can have heart disease, a heart attack, heart failure, high blood pressure, cardiac arrhythmia, cardiomyopathy and many other disease that affect your heart you can have many things go wrong with your narcissism. A modern approach to psychoanalysis sees narcissism as fundamental the way Freud saw the libidio as fundamental https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Analysis_of_the_Self https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Analysis_of_the_Self Today people use "narcissism" as a synonym for bad. See this book for commentary on that https://www.bookforum.com/print/2303/kristin-dombek-s-adventures-in-the-world-of-contemporary-narcissism-16511 https://www.bookforum.com/print/2303/kristin-dombek-s-advent...
  - raxxorraxor 4y ago
    I don't think self-love is a good substitution. Pathological narcissism can have its source in extreme insecurity, which might not be too visible from the outside because it gets overacted. Some self-centeredness is completely normal, you are your own protagonist, but too much of it is certainly bad on many metrics. Freud tends to generalise too much, especially on the topic of libido. His mentor Breuer is a better source in my opinion. Insecure people might be too critical with themselves and would be afraid of being narcissistic perhaps. They should not in most cases. > When you brush your teeth that's an expression of your narcissism I don't believe any form of self-care is an narcissistic act. I think that softens it too much. But technically the title is accurate since there is narcissism in everyone.

1 points by 4monthsaway 4y ago

> And maybe that’s okay. No, it's not okay because it leaves victims in its wake. NPD[1] can result in broken families, friendships that don't materialize, loneliness, depression, suicidality. That's not to say that you shouldn't look out for yourself, but if you're only looking out for yourself then it's basically self-imposed isolation. [1] https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Narcissistic_personality_disorder https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Narcissistic_personality_disor...

raxxorraxor 4y ago

Narcissism is a spectrum and nobody is completely free of it which every psychologist worth his salt can attest. But there is pathological narcissism and that comes at a huge cost to others and it can very well be a defense mechanism that warrants therapy. The author does sound a bit defensive here, but not in a pathological sense.

PaulHoule 4y ago
"Spectrum" isn't the way to put it. "Narcissism" means self-love. When you brush your teeth that's an expression of your narcissism. Everybody has "narcissism" because it is a part of your psyche the way that your heart is part of your body. Just like you can have heart disease, a heart attack, heart failure, high blood pressure, cardiac arrhythmia, cardiomyopathy and many other disease that affect your heart you can have many things go wrong with your narcissism. A modern approach to psychoanalysis sees narcissism as fundamental the way Freud saw the libidio as fundamental https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Analysis_of_the_Self https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Analysis_of_the_Self Today people use "narcissism" as a synonym for bad. See this book for commentary on that https://www.bookforum.com/print/2303/kristin-dombek-s-adventures-in-the-world-of-contemporary-narcissism-16511 https://www.bookforum.com/print/2303/kristin-dombek-s-advent...
- raxxorraxor 4y ago
  I don't think self-love is a good substitution. Pathological narcissism can have its source in extreme insecurity, which might not be too visible from the outside because it gets overacted. Some self-centeredness is completely normal, you are your own protagonist, but too much of it is certainly bad on many metrics. Freud tends to generalise too much, especially on the topic of libido. His mentor Breuer is a better source in my opinion. Insecure people might be too critical with themselves and would be afraid of being narcissistic perhaps. They should not in most cases. > When you brush your teeth that's an expression of your narcissism I don't believe any form of self-care is an narcissistic act. I think that softens it too much. But technically the title is accurate since there is narcissism in everyone.