So strange to read this as marriage hasn't really registered as thing for me in several years. I'm not sure what the case for it today is. Reading about guys sa

So strange to read this as marriage hasn't really registered as thing for me in several years. I'm not sure what the case for it today is. Reading about guys saying if only they had been less of themselves, they might have avoided getting left just leaves me with a bad taste. I'm of the mind that we should take responsibility for our own happiness, and explicitly give others the opportunity to do the same for themselves. Controversially, if there is one thing I have found people live to regret most it's apologizing. It has taken a while to articulate, but I think apologies are a broken concept because they are what we offer transactionally when we are at a disadvantage, they're an unsatisfying, forced declaration of kind of moral bankruptcy and submission, which is the exact opposite of what someone who loves you wishes for you, or wants from you. I consider that what I really mean is, "I took this specific thing for granted and what I mean is I don't take it for granted, and thank you for it." Acknowledging and thanking someone for what you recieved from them adds value to a relationship, whereas an apology just asks to write it off. The same may be true for promises as apologies are mainly an artifact of breaking them. Taking responsibility for our own happiness and converting apologies into recognition and thanks before uttering them seems a lot more sustainable and likeable than being introspective and trying to change and compromise. Maybe I'm out of touch, but something about the article rubbed me the wrong way.