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Ask HN: Am I being too ambitious?
Hey HN!
Before I get into it, I just want to thank you all for the overwhelming responses I've received on my recent Ask HN (the one about my interest in many disciplines [0], I bring this up because it's all kinda related).
Sorry that this post is going to be long, because it's, well, ambitious. More ambitious than anything I've done with my life.
In short, I'm working on something that involves writing a series of long-form critical essays to be published on a website of my own. It's going to be a long process, so I'm hoping to get some feedback on the feasibility of it all.
I've been trying to keep this a secret for fear of judgement and of "leaking my ideas", but I'm starting to think that keeping it so private may be doing more harm than good.
I'm sharing all this here now because I trust HN to give a diverse set of honest and critical feedback, which I really need. I also feel that HN is going to be the audience that will understand my overarching theses the most. I know there will be some people here that will disagree with my points, but that's part of the process and I'm prepared for that.
Anyway, there's a lot to unpack. I'll start with my backstory, as for me there really was a interesting narrative that led up to all this.
... (due to character limits, I'll have to continue in the comments: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=30976499 ) ...
- samh748 5y agoSeveral years ago I dreamt of becoming a university professor. I was young and naive and got a lot of ego-boost from my peers and professors who really praised me for how smart I was. I did some research projects during my undergrad (I studied Ecology & Evolutionary Biology), then went immediately into a PhD following graduation. At that point, my own idealistic expectations of myself (and of academia), combined with conflict with my parents and other personal life chaos, all slammed in my face as I tried to navigate grad school. I got depressed (though I didn't recognize it at the time), got nothing achieved, and eventually dropped out. My life and my dreams all crashed before me, I became very distant from my parents, and I spent the next several years numbed out, trying to figure out what the hell to do with my life now. Fortunately, it was during this next phase of my life, after the fire had burnt through everything, that I went through some incredible personal growth and transformation, alongside with my partner. I learned how to navigate relationships, I learned about differences and about universals. I learned how to love. I learned how to accept and embrace change. I revisited my past traumas and started to heal. Life became less chaotic and I could finally breathe a little and at least live a low-lying life. Then roughly two years ago, due to some pretty big changes in lifestyle (moving, went back to do some school) and all the expectations that came with it, I went into my second depressive episode. This time around, even though the experience itself was darker and more tormenting, I was more aware of what's happening in my mind. I could hear all the voices in my head, I could describe my pain, and so I wrote about them and shared it with my few friends on social media. There wasn't much response, but something inside me started to change. By writing down my most vulnerable thoughts and feelings and trying to communicate them to others, it helped me to make sense of these experiences. The more I wrote, the more clarity I found. I started to really see and feel my traumas and pains, and after some gut-wrenching catharsis, my depression lifted. What was even more incredible though, was how these experiences would then drastically transform my view of the world. As the fog in my mind cleared, I started to pay more attention to the world around me, more so than I ever have. I've always known about social issues, but nothing ever really clicked, and so I never really cared. As I paid more attention, I started to see the problems of our world more clearly. After nearly 30 years of life, I finally looked outside my own little bubble. Everything started to matter now, and I felt so alive. I started thinking seriously about various topics, started asking questions, and started writing privately about all of them. I became genuinely interested in one discipline after another, slowly expanding my realm and my worldview, trying to make sense of the more fundamental questions and ideas that stretched across disciplines. Slowly, as I learned more about the world and looked back on my life, I began to realize that everything that had happened in my life, from my idealistic career fantasies, to the conflicts in my relationships, to the trauma and the depression and all the growth that followed, can be explained and understood in one way or another. But as I looked out at the world, I began to notice, literally everywhere, that people are stuck in problems and debates because of some very fundamental misunderstandings about how things work. I started to realize that, nearly all of us have been binded to and blinded by our cultural assumptions of everything, from careers to relationships, to society, to science itself. And if the problems of our world and in our personal lives can be better understood, they can also be prevented or improved upon, if only we weren't so complacent about it all.
- samh748 5y agoOver the past year or so, as I observed and reflected and tried to map out everything in my head, I've been consciously constructing a chain of inter-connected theses into a series of critical essays. The goal has been to communicate some basic concepts to layman, intellectuals, and policy-makers alike, challenging many of the fundamental ideas that we assume as "truth" or "common-knowledge", and discussing the many complex implications of such assumptions. Ultimately, my vision is to inspire cultural change that is grounded in a firm understanding of some basic principles (outline below). And to be clear, I don't expect these changes to take place within several years; rather, they will likely take decades if not generations to fully realize (if ever). The structure isn't entirely set yet, but the essays with rough descriptions are as follows: 1. Unpacking Complexity (introducing the abstract concepts of complexity and uncertainty, context, implications, the process of inquiry and understanding, critical thinking, nuance and language) 2. Reconstructing Reality (applying complexity to the real world, challenging ideals like truth and objectivity, discussing the implications of "rigid science") 3. Discovering Diversity (introducing the idea that we are all living in our own perceptions of how humans and the world works, that humans are more diverse than we'd ever imagine, introduce various personality theories/frameworks, generational differences, etc.) 4. Explaining Humans (seeing humans through the lens of our needs, reframing human nature as something more dynamic rather than static, seeing the lasting effects of our upbringing and our experiences in general) 5. Confronting Ourselves (illustrating the complicated nature of genuine personal growth, the role of the ego, challenging simplistic ideals such as "empathy" and "authenticity", discussing ways to move towards genuine love) Taken together, these essays will collectively be called The Beginnings of Understanding. The central thesis being that the process of understanding can and should be expanded upon to cover all of the areas above, and that understanding isn't merely an intellectual exercise, but an emotional and almost visceral one. ... This is my vision, one that I've thought very seriously about and worked very hard to improve deliberately for almost two years. I've let enough time pass and my ego subside to minimize the possibility of this being a completely imagined fantasy with no real solid grounding. While I lack the expertise of making fallacy-proof arguments, I'm confident that I understand these topics enough to make a significant contribution towards this vision. At this point, I've accumulated entire notebooks worth of thinking-on-the-page and have gotten most of the ideas fleshed out, but they're scattered in my notes and I'll need to do some real work to weave everything together in a coherent and compelling manner. Also, it's not like I can just write and publish one essay and see how it goes. They are all interconnected so I'll need to have most of it written before I can publish any part of it; I'm basically writing a book. My main problem now is being able to find enough time and attention to really get this thing off the ground. I've got a day job of course [1] and a family to raise and barely have enough time in a day to get enough rest [2]. I wish I was a professor that can go on sabbatical to write a textbook. If only they gave out grants for stuff like this! Anyway, there are probably a host of other things to consider to make this a reality, and that's why I'm asking, very generally, whether I'm being too ambitious. Not because I think I lack ability, but because it feels near-impossible with all the practical constraints I have on my life. With so many things to juggle, it's hard to build and maintain enough momentum to keep this thing going in any meaningful sense. I certainly don't want this to take 10 years to complete. Another consideration is that I'm basically working on this entirely by myself. My partner is very supportive and in fact a very good bouncing-board for my ideas, but she can't write it for me. I've also told some friends about parts of it but most of them just kinda give me a blank-stare, or at best just support me at a distance because they don't really understand what I'm trying to do. Plus, it seems most people are too busy with their own lives to care much for someone else's endeavours. At least that's been the case for me. So anyway, this is an invitation for anyone out there who wants to volunteer to be on my "committee" LOL. Jokes aside, if anyone does want to support me in any way, I'd love to know. Whether it's volunteering to proof-read some drafts, or to discuss and further flesh out certain things, or just giving general advice. And of course, no commitment necessary. It'll be wonderful just knowing that other people want to see this come to fruition. If interested, maybe leave me a comment with some way to contact you (email, twitter, etc). I think that's everything I have to say about all this. Would love to hear what you folks think! Thank you so so so so much for getting through this long post. I hope it was worth it. Much love, Sam :) PS. And if anyone cares, after I publish the above essays / The Beginnings of Understanding, aka "Book One", I will follow up with a "Book Zero" which will consist of several personal essays with stories like the one above. It's cheesy I know but I think it's also kinda cool. :P I'm also planning on presenting the critical essays in video form on youtube, and the website (under construction) will include some notes from my readings, etc. [0] My recent Ask HN post on being interested in many disciplines: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=30928105 https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=30928105 - I asked this as I had been struggling to find more constructive reasons to do more reading, since these readings don't explicitly tie in to the essays I'll be writing. [1] I wrote about my day job briefly in this comment: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=30929984 https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=30929984 [2] A recent post where I wondered about possibly having ADHD and my struggles related to that: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=30952648 https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=30952648
- ksaj 5y agoI'm sure you've come across the word 'hypergraphia' at some point in your life. This Ask HN was a long essay in and of itself. It feels like this wasn't really asking anything, but instead was all about telling HN about your life story, disguised as a question.
- samh748 5y agoI didn't know about hypergraphia until now. I was considering that this might work better as a Show HN or something, but I don't have a website or anything to post this, and I felt the need to justify my question by explaining everything. Definitely something I gotta work on, but for now this is what I got. Thanks for the feedback though, really. Any feedback is better than none at all.
- yuppie_scum 5y agoThis feels like a clickbait post (exploit the “curiosity gap” to make people click and read quasi-related content)
- samh748 5y agoTo be honest I was worried about that too, but I didn't know how else to do it. Sorry about that :S
- adg001 5y agoSam, 1/ 'All happy families are alike; each unhappy family is unhappy in its own way.' - Which is to say that we all have faced, at some point in time, significant challenges... (I will refrain to tell you about my own ones). Having read your three part Ask HN, the first thing I want to tell you is 'please go straight to the point when posting here, or only a few folks will give proper consideration to what you write; 2/ Secondly, think strategically. You have the ambition to write a long form essay about self-help, psychology, sociology, and semiotics. This is excellent! At the same time though be sure to first position yourself as somebody that is not only knowledgeable – I am sure you are – but also recognised as being as such, and, therefore, authoritative and well known enough to publish in that field. Or, getting published will turn to be very hard, and, in the event you get your work out there, only a limited a few will pay attention, again; 3/ I am not knowledgeable enough to tell you if the proposed structuring makes sense. If it does for you, fine! However dozen of books get published in the more general self-help section every year. Be sure to contrast your proposed structure to what already exists, and to make it digestible by your target audience. Not many people are well versed in multiple discipline, be sure to guide your target audience gently in your interdisciplinary analyses. Much love, alfonso
- samh748 5y agoThank you so much alfonso for the thorough and honest feedback! > position yourself as somebody that is not only knowledgeable ... but also recognised as being as such Do you mind expanding on that? I think I get the point, but I don't understand concretely how it could be done.
- adg001 5y agoAbsolutely. There is no one fits all solution, because everything is context dependent a non trivial. Set aside (a) the contents to be published, the publication of a long form essay requires both (b) a readership and (c) marketing. There are multiple strategies that can provide you with the required readership and marketing; it is important to be inventive. But those strategies typically resemble one of the following. You either 1/ have gained in your career the kind of reputation in your field of choice (e.g., doing research and publishing papers) that allows you to approach a publishing house and reassure them that a large enough number of readers will be purchasing the book you have the ambition to write – in such case the marketing will result from the combination of your personal efforts, some marketing done by the publishing house, viral marketing, and the support of the network of distributors - or, 2/ you are such a powerhouse of marketing (I'll get back to this in a second), that you can publish essentially everything, even suboptimal contents. When it comes to (1) there are endless examples I could make; but let's consider for instance the excellent 'The Dawn of Everything: A New History of Humanity' by David Graeber and David Wengrow – a work situated at the interstitial space that exist between comparative archaeology and anthropology. For an example of (2) think Tony Robbins and the various self-help blockbusters he published. He provides some massive training events and he leverages those events to market all kind of additional materials and contents to his clients. Now Tony Robbins offers a digested form the results in (applied) psychology obtained by academic scholars; it is more a vulgarisation work equipped with top marketing, then first hand research. I hope I provided you some entry points to dig further. All the best!
- TigeriusKirk 5y agoI think you should pursue this. Primarily because it will force you to structure your ideas and that will benefit you personally. I don't think you should pay much attention to any feedback you get here as this isn't really the right forum for meaningful discussion of such topics. Yes, this is an incredibly ambitious path to set off on. Yes, the likely outcome is that your book will simply be ignored. That's the most likely outcome for any book, and moreso for books on deep, serious topics. So be sure you're ready for that, and do it anyway.
- samh748 5y agoThank you so much for your encouragement! It's unfortunate I don't have any other place/people to show this to and to ask for feedback. But even the small number of feedback I get here is better than none. Thanks again! :)
- crowdyriver 5y agoHello Sam, I don't know if you've heard about this youtube channel, actualized. I'm not sure if I should recommend it to you, because, well, it takes extreme an extreme openmind to see his videos, but I'm sure you could confirm plenty of ideas you've contemplated in your life from him. Following actualized advice changed my mind and my whole worldview, I'm sure it could help you as well. I strongly recommend his series on ego development: part 1: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J3hNosyyXRA https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J3hNosyyXRA part 2: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G8fIhLDV3L4 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G8fIhLDV3L4 part 3: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pGItuEai8vo https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pGItuEai8vo From what you've wrote you seem to be in an advanced stage, but again, I'm no expert to judge. Maybe you already know Leo Gura's work! In that sense, I have nothing to share with you, but if you don't, god I cannot recommend you his channel enough. Just these 3 videos I linked to can reinforce or even expand your worldview so much.
- crowdyriver 5y agoSo in my honest opinion, go ahead! If your book or book series is digestible enough, I could potentially be interested in reading it. There could be a lot of value in it, even if it doesn't reach such big audience like books from authors as Tony Robbins could. Most people won't even care about what you're trying to write, the yt links I posted (the first one specially) will explain why :). If it's meaningful to you, and you've got a lovely partner that understands and supports you with that, go for it!
- samh748 5y agoHello! Thank you so much for your encouraging response and for sharing Leo Gura's work! I've only watched a bit of the videos and I'm already in love! I learned about Spiral Dynamics previously as well as a bunch of other developmental and personality models. I would be nothing like the person I am today without them! This looks awesome! Thank you! I'm glad you're open to my ideas! And I definitely agree that most people won't get it, even if they did somehow read it. But I'm hoping I'll succeed in making it digestible and gentle enough that these ideas can at least stay in the back of people's minds, until they are ready later in life. So glad I shared this. I'm surprised I'm still getting trailing upvotes here and there. If you're interested and open to it, feel free to leave me a way to contact you (twitter, email, blog) so I can send you some drafts or whatnot. Or we can share some deep psychology stuff. :)