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Fwiw it's great that you're seeking other perspectives and I don't think those errors were on you at all. Agree with a lot of what everyone is saying in general
by bryanleejh 5y ago
Fwiw it's great that you're seeking other perspectives and I don't think those errors were on you at all. Agree with a lot of what everyone is saying in general. Sounds like bad systems and bad culture. That being said keep working on yourself and learning. I would also recommend reading books like the effective engineer and following software engineers on twitter like Gergely Orosz. The more experience you get and the more you talk to experienced engineers the better things will get.
- rocqua 5y agoI would add to this that holding yourself to what you think are the expectations of others isn't fair to yourself. It seems like you think you have to hide how badly you feel you are doing, and that shame is keeping you from asking help. Stop that. You have nothing to be ashamed about. You have tried really hard despite many times being knocked down. Making mistakes is normal, and not doing well when not being guided is also normal. These are not things that reflect badly on you as an engineer, let alone as a person. So stop beating yourself up. Then ask for help. If no help is forthcoming either escalate to your manager's boss, or quit and find a less shitty place.