If I am just getting to know you, I will use references like "my husband" or "my husband, Tom". After I have know you a while, I will probably become less form

If I am just getting to know you, I will use references like "my husband" or "my husband, Tom". After I have know you a while, I will probably become less formal and just use the name "Tom" on the assumption that with history and context you will know who I mean. If these people are colleagues, is the the first time you are speaking to them or do you have an existing relationship?