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Nah, it's a game, training them for when its for real. Like how I sometimes pretend to forget the way home from the library and have my kids give me directions

by progre 5y ago

Nah, it's a game, training them for when its for real. Like how I sometimes pretend to forget the way home from the library and have my kids give me directions home while I'm driving. This is how they learn to actually pay attention to where they are.

dudeman13 5y ago
It's not a game if you can't choose to stop playing it. People just don't respect kids. Would you enjoy that game with other adults? Even if no matter the situation they wouldn't give a shit if you wanted to stop playing it or not? Not being able to trust anyone ever to be acting in good faith and be honest is one of the reasons why we can't have nice things.
- progre 5y ago
  I don't respect my kids? You don't know shit. Anyway, "other adults" lie all the time. Every employer I ever had has lied one time or another. This is important information. Bringing kids up into some fairies and unicorn fantasy where everything is unthinkingly accepted, thats disrespecting children
  - dudeman13 5y ago
    >Anyway, "other adults" lie all the time Yes, and if this is their standard modus operandi the healthy thing to do, if possible, is getting rid of them from your life. Are you gonna be happy when your kids start playing the game with you? When they are the ones unilaterally deciding what matters and what doesn't? If the answer is "no" then you aren't respecting them as individuals capable of learning, thought and action. And I got the feeling you won't be happy when they do it with you. When you constantly play games like that you are also establishing that you can never be trusted, even if they think it matters.
  - drooby 5y ago
    You don’t have to lie to your children to teach them how to think critically about the world. Nor do the actions of other adults necessarily make lying okay. You may even be doing your children a disservice by teaching them that lying is okay or humorous. I know, I know. I don’t know you at all.. but yes, what your saying does sound like it may be disrespectful to be honest.
smeej 5y ago
I'm 100% sure my dad believed then and would defend now that it was just a game. Games aren't fun when you don't know someone's playing with you and you're trying to be serious. YMMV, and I hope it does. I'm just providing the anecdote that I'm not in touch with my dad anymore, and dishonesty that at least looked a lot like what you're describing is a significant part of the reason.
smusamashah 5y ago
You dont have to lie to them to train them in anything. I sincerely believe you have forgotten what it is like being a kid and how it feels when elders tell you something which isn't truth. I remember being a kid. I don't lie to kids, not intentionally. They can be very easily mislead and lying feels so wrong for this reason alone. I don't trust elders in family who lied or use to lie to me when I was a kid and I found out it was a lie at that time. That image of them lying has stayed. To train them about finding way back home you can just ask them to lead you home. It will make them feel good that their parent is trusting them to take them home. Make it their responsibility. Go wherever your kids lead you to. It will be more fun than lying. Same can be done for almost anything else you think you should lie about to teach them.

by progre 5y ago

dudeman13 5y ago

It's not a game if you can't choose to stop playing it. People just don't respect kids. Would you enjoy that game with other adults? Even if no matter the situation they wouldn't give a shit if you wanted to stop playing it or not? Not being able to trust anyone ever to be acting in good faith and be honest is one of the reasons why we can't have nice things.

progre 5y ago
I don't respect my kids? You don't know shit. Anyway, "other adults" lie all the time. Every employer I ever had has lied one time or another. This is important information. Bringing kids up into some fairies and unicorn fantasy where everything is unthinkingly accepted, thats disrespecting children
- dudeman13 5y ago
  >Anyway, "other adults" lie all the time Yes, and if this is their standard modus operandi the healthy thing to do, if possible, is getting rid of them from your life. Are you gonna be happy when your kids start playing the game with you? When they are the ones unilaterally deciding what matters and what doesn't? If the answer is "no" then you aren't respecting them as individuals capable of learning, thought and action. And I got the feeling you won't be happy when they do it with you. When you constantly play games like that you are also establishing that you can never be trusted, even if they think it matters.
- drooby 5y ago
  You don’t have to lie to your children to teach them how to think critically about the world. Nor do the actions of other adults necessarily make lying okay. You may even be doing your children a disservice by teaching them that lying is okay or humorous. I know, I know. I don’t know you at all.. but yes, what your saying does sound like it may be disrespectful to be honest.

smeej 5y ago

I'm 100% sure my dad believed then and would defend now that it was just a game. Games aren't fun when you don't know someone's playing with you and you're trying to be serious. YMMV, and I hope it does. I'm just providing the anecdote that I'm not in touch with my dad anymore, and dishonesty that at least looked a lot like what you're describing is a significant part of the reason.

smusamashah 5y ago

You dont have to lie to them to train them in anything. I sincerely believe you have forgotten what it is like being a kid and how it feels when elders tell you something which isn't truth. I remember being a kid. I don't lie to kids, not intentionally. They can be very easily mislead and lying feels so wrong for this reason alone. I don't trust elders in family who lied or use to lie to me when I was a kid and I found out it was a lie at that time. That image of them lying has stayed. To train them about finding way back home you can just ask them to lead you home. It will make them feel good that their parent is trusting them to take them home. Make it their responsibility. Go wherever your kids lead you to. It will be more fun than lying. Same can be done for almost anything else you think you should lie about to teach them.