4 ms·

I think it's great that you're reflecting on what blogging meant for you before and discovering that freedom of doing things for yourself now. But it's also im

I think it's great that you're reflecting on what blogging meant for you before and discovering that freedom of doing things for yourself now. But it's also important to not project your own previous potentially ego-driven activities towards everyone else in the world. Yes, I'm sure there are other people that had the same insecurities/ego, but it definitely doesn't mean everyone who ever blogs is like that. When you're able to discern that, you'll slowly gain more clarity about yourself, your own motivations. What often happens, at least for me, is that after an initial pushback, I eventually come back to appreciate the thing more. In your case, now that you've grown from your previous self and taken back some of your personal ownership, you may one day discover a renewed reason and motivation for blogging again. And if/when that time comes, it'll be wonderful also.

sdoering 5y ago
> important to not project your own previous potentially ego-driven activities towards everyone else Or onto OP. You are basically doing exactly what you accuse OP of doing. OP described their experience and asked others for their view. Why project "ego-driven" or not seeing themselves clearly onto them? Why not just answer why you are blogging (or not). Without the assumptions?
- samh748 5y ago
  There's a reason I said explicitly "potentially ego-driven". It's up to OP to decide. There's a difference between projecting vs trying to relate and empathize. And I didn't say I'm going to be 100% correct, it's an interpretation, and I hope it's one that the OP will appreciate, if not immediately then at least in retrospect.
- playpause 5y ago
  The OP literally says this: > I think it boiled down to a realization that no one really gave a damn about me, my writing/work/creations/etc. So then, what's the point? Is it entirely ego driven? Chasing dopamine hits when your post or your project is tweeted about? The comment you’re replying to is kind, insightful, constructive, and non-judgemental.
  - sdoering 5y ago
    > The comment you’re replying to is kind My definition of kind is somewhat different, then. The comment I replied to clearly stated that OP was missing "clarity about yourself, your own motivations" when OP had made that perfectly clear and even took action once they had realized it. These projections are imho not "kind", nor "constructive, and non-judgemental". But YMMV.
    - playpause 5y ago
      > The comment I replied to clearly stated… No it didn’t. You’ve just quoted a few words out of context and prefixed it with “missing”, adding an accusative tone that was not present.
      - sdoering 5y ago
        Let me quote the whole part: > But it's also important to not project your own previous potentially ego-driven activities towards everyone else in the world. Yes, I'm sure there are other people that had the same insecurities/ego, but it definitely doesn't mean everyone who ever blogs is like that. Please enlighten me how this is "kind". I would love to know how you rationalize/explain this. And I mean it. I get up every day to learn something. So maybe there is an opportunity for me here. As I already said, your mileage may vary, but I yet fail to see the kindness in these words. You quoted the original author. I need to split it in two to better explain my thoughts: > I think it boiled down to a realization that no one really gave a damn about me, my writing/work/creations/etc. That is a realization. Fair if one looks at the grand scheme of things. So then, what's the point? Is it entirely ego driven? Chasing dopamine hits when your post or your project is tweeted about? These are as much rhetoric questions as questions towards us as the audience imho. So I didn't read it as statement about OP themselves. But if I see this as a rhetoric figure, how can I use this as argument to say OP had "potentially ego-driven activities"? To me this was using rhetoric figures against OP to construct an "argument". Especially the additional comment from the commenter as answer on the original comment I replied to: > Oh and, dear OP, if you're comfortable with personal growth, it may be helpful to realize that, our frustrations often stem from our disappointments, that our feelings of anger are often a protection from more vulnerable feelings like sadness. To me that sounded awfully condescending. How was that not projecting onto OP? If I want to be seen talking down onto someone, I would talk/write that way. Would, as said, love to know your thoughts.
samh748 5y ago
Oh and, dear OP, if you're comfortable with personal growth, it may be helpful to realize that, our frustrations often stem from our disappointments, that our feelings of anger are often a protection from more vulnerable feelings like sadness. It doesn't have to be uber-sadness of course, but it's very normal to feel disappointed when our efforts (eg blogging) don't seem to be recognized. When we can process our frustrations and understand our experiences a bit more, it'll be a lot easier to move forward with a refreshed mindset. :)

sdoering 5y ago

> important to not project your own previous potentially ego-driven activities towards everyone else Or onto OP. You are basically doing exactly what you accuse OP of doing. OP described their experience and asked others for their view. Why project "ego-driven" or not seeing themselves clearly onto them? Why not just answer why you are blogging (or not). Without the assumptions?

samh748 5y ago
There's a reason I said explicitly "potentially ego-driven". It's up to OP to decide. There's a difference between projecting vs trying to relate and empathize. And I didn't say I'm going to be 100% correct, it's an interpretation, and I hope it's one that the OP will appreciate, if not immediately then at least in retrospect.
playpause 5y ago
The OP literally says this: > I think it boiled down to a realization that no one really gave a damn about me, my writing/work/creations/etc. So then, what's the point? Is it entirely ego driven? Chasing dopamine hits when your post or your project is tweeted about? The comment you’re replying to is kind, insightful, constructive, and non-judgemental.
- sdoering 5y ago
  > The comment you’re replying to is kind My definition of kind is somewhat different, then. The comment I replied to clearly stated that OP was missing "clarity about yourself, your own motivations" when OP had made that perfectly clear and even took action once they had realized it. These projections are imho not "kind", nor "constructive, and non-judgemental". But YMMV.
  - playpause 5y ago
    > The comment I replied to clearly stated… No it didn’t. You’ve just quoted a few words out of context and prefixed it with “missing”, adding an accusative tone that was not present.
    - sdoering 5y ago
      Let me quote the whole part: > But it's also important to not project your own previous potentially ego-driven activities towards everyone else in the world. Yes, I'm sure there are other people that had the same insecurities/ego, but it definitely doesn't mean everyone who ever blogs is like that. Please enlighten me how this is "kind". I would love to know how you rationalize/explain this. And I mean it. I get up every day to learn something. So maybe there is an opportunity for me here. As I already said, your mileage may vary, but I yet fail to see the kindness in these words. You quoted the original author. I need to split it in two to better explain my thoughts: > I think it boiled down to a realization that no one really gave a damn about me, my writing/work/creations/etc. That is a realization. Fair if one looks at the grand scheme of things. So then, what's the point? Is it entirely ego driven? Chasing dopamine hits when your post or your project is tweeted about? These are as much rhetoric questions as questions towards us as the audience imho. So I didn't read it as statement about OP themselves. But if I see this as a rhetoric figure, how can I use this as argument to say OP had "potentially ego-driven activities"? To me this was using rhetoric figures against OP to construct an "argument". Especially the additional comment from the commenter as answer on the original comment I replied to: > Oh and, dear OP, if you're comfortable with personal growth, it may be helpful to realize that, our frustrations often stem from our disappointments, that our feelings of anger are often a protection from more vulnerable feelings like sadness. To me that sounded awfully condescending. How was that not projecting onto OP? If I want to be seen talking down onto someone, I would talk/write that way. Would, as said, love to know your thoughts.

samh748 5y ago

Oh and, dear OP, if you're comfortable with personal growth, it may be helpful to realize that, our frustrations often stem from our disappointments, that our feelings of anger are often a protection from more vulnerable feelings like sadness. It doesn't have to be uber-sadness of course, but it's very normal to feel disappointed when our efforts (eg blogging) don't seem to be recognized. When we can process our frustrations and understand our experiences a bit more, it'll be a lot easier to move forward with a refreshed mindset. :)