4 ms·

Yikes. Some of us are just friendly.

• ALittleLight 5y ago
  Small talk enjoyers have the advantage that they can nonconsensually initiate small talk and it's rude for small talk dislikers to even express their dislike. I don't see how unilaterally engaging people in an activity that only you like is "friendly".
  • skeeter2020 5y ago
    How about because an individual puts themself out there to try and build a relationship around shared values, activities, joys? If it's not reciprocated they try something else, or eventually move on. I think you're using "small talk" pejoratively, but all big and deep things start off small. Example: I met my wife of 20+ years eating lunch at a picnic table over casual conversation, so I'm all-in on small talk.
    • ALittleLight 5y ago
      I met my wife when we were both posting on a forum about how we wanted to get married and have kids. We didn't start off with small talk and are now married and have kids, so I think that disproves your notion of "all big and deep things start off small." Perhaps always starting small is one approach, but it's not a universal one. As another example, I'd point to this conversation. You and I don't need to engage in small talk here to share our thoughts on some subject. I directly state my opinion and you state yours and we can discuss. At no point do I need to ask how your day was, about the weather, or what you did over the weekend. I am interested in discussions (that's why I participate in them online) but I don't care about any of that banal stuff. I hope your weekend was great, but I don't need to know about it.
      • ineptech 5y ago
        You're missing the point of small talk, which is largely nonverbal. Is it wise to assume an API that returns an empty message body is broken, or to look for useful information in the response code and the headers?