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Why do you keep doing things that don't make you happy? Why do you feel the need to do so many extra-curricular activities related to child education? Can't y

by efitz 5y ago

Why do you keep doing things that don't make you happy? Why do you feel the need to do so many extra-curricular activities related to child education? Can't you take your kids to the park, show them stuff and talk to them about it? One of the cool things that most adults forget about childhood is that everything is new for kids. Even stuff that kids are used to; they have really only scratched the surface of- they haven't had the time or the life experience to deeply understand things, but they also haven't had the life experience to become jaded or cynical. Spending some time around them doing stuff that is not homework, can be fun, or at least interesting. Do you want to be unfulfilled? If you truly cannot find joy in anything, then you are likely suffering from depression, and you should go see a doctor. It won't get better by itself.

jjeaff 5y ago
I have to keep reminding myself that my kids are completely new to everything. A lot of times I try to overthink activities and learning opportunities but then I will remember that they are children and something as simple as mixing food coloring and baking soda and vinegar in the kitchen can make for hours of fun activity.
k_sze 5y ago
> Why do you feel the need to do so many extra-curricular activities related to child education? Because this is Hong Kong, and if you want to get into a good high school, and then a good university later in life, this is what you do here, unless either A) your kid has really high IQ and would skip years or B) you are rich and don't mind just paying your way through international schools. My kids are not case A), and I'm not rich enough for B). Schools here ask you "what credentials do you have (other then regular education)?", "have you won any competition?", etc. I'm not even doing that much, compared to other really competitive families.
- jokethrowaway 5y ago
  Good schools are overrated, don't let them ruin your life
  - sibeliuss 5y ago
    Exactly, probably better to teach ones kids how to be decent little people and then have faith that they'll figure it out.
    - deleted 5y ago
      [deleted]
    - YeGoblynQueenne 5y ago
      Figure out that unless you've won the genetic lottery you don't need to apply? >> Because this is Hong Kong, and if you want to get into a good high school, and then a good university later in life, this is what you do here, unless either A) your kid has really high IQ and would skip years or B) you are rich and don't mind just paying your way through international schools. Sounds like the plot of GATTACA. Maybe people who don't live there should not hand out advice too easily?
      - ideamotor 5y ago
        Yep. I cannot advise. In Texas education is not considered enough. But this sounds ridiculously too far the other way. The book “The Myth of Merit” comes to mind.
  - rackjack 5y ago
    Easy to say this when you don't have 1 billion people also gunning for the opportunities you want (maybe less since they're in Hong Kong and not the mainland)
    - patrickz 5y ago
      Involution...
    - pm90 5y ago
      There’s definitely a lot of competition but 1 Billion is probably not the right number. From the Wikipedia page for the examination required to get into Universities in HK, the number of test takers in 2020 is: 52,687 [0]. This doesn’t include students using international exams to get in, but that seems to be a fraction of this number. Still very challenging but not 1 billion challenging. [0]: https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hong_Kong_Diploma_of_Secondary_Education https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hong_Kong_Diploma_of_Seconda...
- qw3rty01 5y ago
  Just want to emphasize the last sentence of the parent post, some of what you were describing really sounds like either leading to, or full blown depression, and want to mirror the recommendation to get professional help even if it feels like it would be a waste of time or bother people around you
- cultofmetatron 5y ago
  sounds like a dystopian nightmare. Makes me glad to live in a country where not getting into the best school doesn't automatically doom you to a lifetime of failure.
  - leaflets2 5y ago
    I don't even know what schools in the country where I live, are considered the best :-) I just picked the closest uni (worked out fine. This is in northern Europe)
jcpst 5y ago
The last paragraph hits home. Going to a therapist has done wonders for me.

by efitz 5y ago

jjeaff 5y ago

I have to keep reminding myself that my kids are completely new to everything. A lot of times I try to overthink activities and learning opportunities but then I will remember that they are children and something as simple as mixing food coloring and baking soda and vinegar in the kitchen can make for hours of fun activity.

k_sze 5y ago

> Why do you feel the need to do so many extra-curricular activities related to child education? Because this is Hong Kong, and if you want to get into a good high school, and then a good university later in life, this is what you do here, unless either A) your kid has really high IQ and would skip years or B) you are rich and don't mind just paying your way through international schools. My kids are not case A), and I'm not rich enough for B). Schools here ask you "what credentials do you have (other then regular education)?", "have you won any competition?", etc. I'm not even doing that much, compared to other really competitive families.

jokethrowaway 5y ago
Good schools are overrated, don't let them ruin your life
- sibeliuss 5y ago
  Exactly, probably better to teach ones kids how to be decent little people and then have faith that they'll figure it out.
  - deleted 5y ago
    [deleted]
  - YeGoblynQueenne 5y ago
    Figure out that unless you've won the genetic lottery you don't need to apply? >> Because this is Hong Kong, and if you want to get into a good high school, and then a good university later in life, this is what you do here, unless either A) your kid has really high IQ and would skip years or B) you are rich and don't mind just paying your way through international schools. Sounds like the plot of GATTACA. Maybe people who don't live there should not hand out advice too easily?
    - ideamotor 5y ago
      Yep. I cannot advise. In Texas education is not considered enough. But this sounds ridiculously too far the other way. The book “The Myth of Merit” comes to mind.
- rackjack 5y ago
  Easy to say this when you don't have 1 billion people also gunning for the opportunities you want (maybe less since they're in Hong Kong and not the mainland)
  - patrickz 5y ago
    Involution...
  - pm90 5y ago
    There’s definitely a lot of competition but 1 Billion is probably not the right number. From the Wikipedia page for the examination required to get into Universities in HK, the number of test takers in 2020 is: 52,687 [0]. This doesn’t include students using international exams to get in, but that seems to be a fraction of this number. Still very challenging but not 1 billion challenging. [0]: https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hong_Kong_Diploma_of_Secondary_Education https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hong_Kong_Diploma_of_Seconda...
qw3rty01 5y ago
Just want to emphasize the last sentence of the parent post, some of what you were describing really sounds like either leading to, or full blown depression, and want to mirror the recommendation to get professional help even if it feels like it would be a waste of time or bother people around you
cultofmetatron 5y ago
sounds like a dystopian nightmare. Makes me glad to live in a country where not getting into the best school doesn't automatically doom you to a lifetime of failure.
- leaflets2 5y ago
  I don't even know what schools in the country where I live, are considered the best :-) I just picked the closest uni (worked out fine. This is in northern Europe)

jcpst 5y ago

The last paragraph hits home. Going to a therapist has done wonders for me.