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Unless you know your internal sense of "things being off" is wrong, listen to it. Often times we pick up on subtle cues before we consciously process them. Yo

Unless you know your internal sense of "things being off" is wrong, listen to it. Often times we pick up on subtle cues before we consciously process them. Your evaluations as someone present override what your non-present friends think based off your verbal accounting.

wolverine876 5y ago
Take it as a signal of something, but certainly don't take it at face value. Apply your intellectual abilities to identifying the origin of that signal. Maybe they just remind you of someone or something; maybe they unwittingly struck a nerve; etc.
metadat 5y ago
+1 for "Trust your gut". Don't ignore it.
- rdtwo 5y ago
  Your gut can be wrong especially if you are a low trust person. I’ve had a lot of times where people did something nice or did something I would never do and I was suspicious but ultimately it turned out good for me. Unexpected human kindness sets off my alarm bells every time, but it’s still a good thing
- wildmanx 5y ago
  Not blindly though. That's also where subconscious biases live. Scientists go to great lengths to mitigate as much as possible of it. Also, the "gut" is where things like racism are rooted.
germinalphrase 5y ago
There is a book called ‘The Gift of Fear’ that explores this topic in more depth for those interested.
pbourke 5y ago
The friends in this story are naive clowns. If OP was a friend of mine I would have advised him to not get involved.
tonyarkles 5y ago
I spent a good five years of my career working (software consulting) at the Starbucks near my old house. As it turns out, the place was a hotspot for MLM pitches (not generally directed at me, but it wasn’t hard to notice). Once or twice, I actually saddled up next to them after their original mark had left and got the pitch, although the conversation generally didn’t last too long when I started to ask for more details. One of the funnier ones ended something like: Me: So what exactly would I be selling? Or doing? That part isn’t clear yet. Him: Ok, let me ask you something. If I told you that you had to shovel cow manure for two years and then you got to retire with a good steady income for the rest of your life, would you do that? Me: does the job involve shoveling manure? Him: No. That’s an analogy. Me: Oh, so it’s not shoveling manure, but it’s like shoveling manure? Him: No no no it’s nothing like that. Me: Oh ok, so what would I be doing then…? And on and on… But, over time, you start to notice subtle tells, and can even see it as they’re walking across the parking lot. “Those folks are going to try to recruit someone into their MLM today!” I really wish I could nail down what exactly those tells are… but even years later, I was sitting having a coffee and my scammer alert went off at a couple walking across the parking lot and sure as shit they spent the following hour trying to recruit some kid. Edit: actually, to your point, is that little things are off. When they do actually talk about business, they use business words but they don’t mean quite the same thing they normally do. Or in the couple from this weekend, they were dressed up like… a stereotype of a “business couple”. Like if you learned how business people dress by watching TV. Just the details were off. He was wearing an expensive looking shirt with a decent tie, but with a spring (not suit) jacket that didn’t match the look, and dress shoes that were simultaneously too fancy to be comfortable on a Sunday afternoon and also too cheap looking to be something you’d wear to the office every day. She had the same kind of thing going on. Fancy frilly black dress with her hair done up (not something you’d normally just wear to Starbucks on a Sunday), but wearing very plain black flats that just didn’t match the fanciness of the dress. And something about her gait… like walking like someone who was trying to look confident? Weird stuff. I dunno.
- robocat 5y ago
  I know other people like you: extremely attuned to subtle signals and they turn out to be bang-on correct. It is a real sign of deep subconscious intelligence that your brain integrates the cues and surfaces the answer. Plenty of people think they are “intuitive” and can “read people”, but actually I think there are few people that are really genius at it. A genius will say it is obvious, because it is to them, and they might even latch onto some rationalisation about how they know. The rationalisations are sometimes not correct, but I suspect the extremely talented can even correctly explain the pattern they have identified. They make me feel like I have an IQ of about 60 . . . although I also believe you need to have some ability to even be aware of the truly skilled, so maybe I have some latent talent!

wolverine876 5y ago

Take it as a signal of something, but certainly don't take it at face value. Apply your intellectual abilities to identifying the origin of that signal. Maybe they just remind you of someone or something; maybe they unwittingly struck a nerve; etc.

metadat 5y ago

+1 for "Trust your gut". Don't ignore it.

rdtwo 5y ago
Your gut can be wrong especially if you are a low trust person. I’ve had a lot of times where people did something nice or did something I would never do and I was suspicious but ultimately it turned out good for me. Unexpected human kindness sets off my alarm bells every time, but it’s still a good thing
wildmanx 5y ago
Not blindly though. That's also where subconscious biases live. Scientists go to great lengths to mitigate as much as possible of it. Also, the "gut" is where things like racism are rooted.

germinalphrase 5y ago

There is a book called ‘The Gift of Fear’ that explores this topic in more depth for those interested.

pbourke 5y ago

The friends in this story are naive clowns. If OP was a friend of mine I would have advised him to not get involved.

tonyarkles 5y ago

I spent a good five years of my career working (software consulting) at the Starbucks near my old house. As it turns out, the place was a hotspot for MLM pitches (not generally directed at me, but it wasn’t hard to notice). Once or twice, I actually saddled up next to them after their original mark had left and got the pitch, although the conversation generally didn’t last too long when I started to ask for more details. One of the funnier ones ended something like: Me: So what exactly would I be selling? Or doing? That part isn’t clear yet. Him: Ok, let me ask you something. If I told you that you had to shovel cow manure for two years and then you got to retire with a good steady income for the rest of your life, would you do that? Me: does the job involve shoveling manure? Him: No. That’s an analogy. Me: Oh, so it’s not shoveling manure, but it’s like shoveling manure? Him: No no no it’s nothing like that. Me: Oh ok, so what would I be doing then…? And on and on… But, over time, you start to notice subtle tells, and can even see it as they’re walking across the parking lot. “Those folks are going to try to recruit someone into their MLM today!” I really wish I could nail down what exactly those tells are… but even years later, I was sitting having a coffee and my scammer alert went off at a couple walking across the parking lot and sure as shit they spent the following hour trying to recruit some kid. Edit: actually, to your point, is that little things are off. When they do actually talk about business, they use business words but they don’t mean quite the same thing they normally do. Or in the couple from this weekend, they were dressed up like… a stereotype of a “business couple”. Like if you learned how business people dress by watching TV. Just the details were off. He was wearing an expensive looking shirt with a decent tie, but with a spring (not suit) jacket that didn’t match the look, and dress shoes that were simultaneously too fancy to be comfortable on a Sunday afternoon and also too cheap looking to be something you’d wear to the office every day. She had the same kind of thing going on. Fancy frilly black dress with her hair done up (not something you’d normally just wear to Starbucks on a Sunday), but wearing very plain black flats that just didn’t match the fanciness of the dress. And something about her gait… like walking like someone who was trying to look confident? Weird stuff. I dunno.

robocat 5y ago
I know other people like you: extremely attuned to subtle signals and they turn out to be bang-on correct. It is a real sign of deep subconscious intelligence that your brain integrates the cues and surfaces the answer. Plenty of people think they are “intuitive” and can “read people”, but actually I think there are few people that are really genius at it. A genius will say it is obvious, because it is to them, and they might even latch onto some rationalisation about how they know. The rationalisations are sometimes not correct, but I suspect the extremely talented can even correctly explain the pattern they have identified. They make me feel like I have an IQ of about 60 . . . although I also believe you need to have some ability to even be aware of the truly skilled, so maybe I have some latent talent!