I chose to focus on the truth of everything, as I was surrounded by delusions and lies. (odd family and relationship/religion stuff) This allows me to say "why

I chose to focus on the truth of everything, as I was surrounded by delusions and lies. (odd family and relationship/religion stuff) This allows me to say "why are we/I doing this?" to nearly everything in my life. But also it forces me to answer the questions I don't want to face too. (why am I treating my body so poorly by X action? What will happen if I can't stop doing this?) Just this morning dealing with 20+ year unresolved relationship communication issues... I was able to just say "can I have Y?" from my spouse and she said yes. But also I said "I feel like I am guessing what you want with Z, do you know what you want and are you waiting for me to guess?" And she said "I actually don't know what I want with Z." I was able to say "That's good, because if you did know and we wasted 20 years more of me just guessing, that would be a lot of wasted time you not getting what you want, and it would make me feel pretty bad about this. And you just saying 'I don't know' means we get to figure it out together, which can be great." Pure freedom, but it still only comes in moments despite my earth shattering experiences from the past, so you still have to work at it to keep it.