> kindness may be ‘Ugh, you've said that five times, here's a sweater!’ The turn of phrase I've used in my internal monologue is "harshly compassionate". The

> kindness may be ‘Ugh, you've said that five times, here's a sweater!’ The turn of phrase I've used in my internal monologue is "harshly compassionate". The example given frames this in terms of assistance, but it goes beyond that. Pearl Jam's song Given To Fly really exemplifies this sort of thing. In the middle of mythologizing and uplifting messaging of love, the word "fuckers" gets dropped in. Similar but not the same: Brooke Allen's contrast of "good" people versus "nice" people <https://brookeallen.com/2015/01/14/how-to-hire-good-people-instead-of-nice-people/ https://brookeallen.com/2015/01/14/how-to-hire-good-people-i...>