How do you know the other person doesn't see you as cruel, or selfish, arrogant, self-centered jerk, or simply douchebag? This whole thing is about accepting o

How do you know the other person doesn't see you as cruel, or selfish, arrogant, self-centered jerk, or simply douchebag? This whole thing is about accepting other possible viewpoints if you don't want to end up as social outcast. I mean we're already in the territory of not-very-balanced people that hurt others enough to have apology expected and don't figure they actually need to apologize on their own (or are too lazy/afraid to do so).