I think it's really important to also not just think of it as "social awkwardness" and also consider that your subconscious is leading you to be more conservati

I think it's really important to also not just think of it as "social awkwardness" and also consider that your subconscious is leading you to be more conservative in social situations which you dislike. It's really nice to be able to master yourself and act in the way that you want, but also I think it's healthy and useful to notice when our natural inclination is to be smaller. The path to finding social situations where you can thrive will almost certainly involve some avoiding people whose social style makes you feel that way.