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I think physical attractiveness has always ranked on people's choice in a mate but I think there is a recent phenomenon with the younger generation to only cons

I think physical attractiveness has always ranked on people's choice in a mate but I think there is a recent phenomenon with the younger generation to only consider physical attractiveness. Regardless of this recent phenomenon I think younger people generally have always prioritized feelings when choosing a mate. So it may not have strictly been physical attractivenes as measured today but more the holistic cultural attractiveness of the time period. I do think that parents can make a wiser choice because their feelings have been tempered with time and thus are not as influenced by feelings and this quality of attractiveness. They can take a more detached and logical approach of the qualities that would make a good long-term mate. Of which feelings are a part of it but of all the things that come together for successful bonding personal feelings are among the most malleable things there are. A person who gives you the butterflies in your stomach and makes you feel attractive this week may not be the same person next week or in 5 years. Because attractiveness is also culturally based it is something that can be learned and relearned. Since this is completely within your own self it is your own power to control and relearn and adapt. There are many more things that go into the relationship you have no power to control. Such as is the person good and honorable. Because despite what we may want time and time again it's shown people rarely can change their core value system. So if a person is not an honest and honorable person in tiny details it is unlikely that they will ever become that for anyone else. We can only look through recent times and throughout all history where we find people curiously attracted to hotness of abusive people. They continually make the cry but they love me and they'll change for me but how often does that really happen. These are the qualities that young people are blinded to because of the emotion and the feeling or that hotness as listed here is their primary quality they're looking at. All it takes is someone to look around when a culture has decided what makes something hot or physically attractive you will quickly see the men adapt to that and peacock around as that thing whatever it is. If it's having no job and being a grunge bum but wearing nice clothes that you scammed off someone that's what you'll see a whole lot of. If it's wealth and security of lifestyle you will see men move toward that. It is only the nature of things.

quantified 5y ago
> I think there is a recent phenomenon with the younger generation to only consider physical attractiveness. I don’t think that’s recent.
quantified 5y ago
> I think there is a recent phenomenon with the younger generation to only consider physical attractiveness. I don’t think that’s recent. Unless you mean “since 1970”
- elmerfud 5y ago
  Agreed, I'm old
- notch656a 5y ago
  1970 roughly corresponds with when mass birth control was readily available, somewhat socially accepted, and fairly reliable to the entire populace ( in US). If you're not going to reproduce but just want sex, it doesn't make sense to focus on traits associated with long term survival of the family. Physical attractiveness becomes relatively more valuable. It's a completely rational choice, and human adaptation to changing sexual landscape.
  - legalcorrection 5y ago
    It's not a completely rational choice. Sexual relationships tend to lead to emotional attachment. So you start sleeping with someone because they're hot, even though they are a poor prospect for marriage, but you end up falling in love with them anyway. One thing leads to another and suddenly you're married with kids. Some people are capable of exceptional rationality—or perhaps exceptional coldness and calculation—but most of us are merely middling in our capacity to act contrary to our emotional natures. So we do better by avoiding reckless sexual relationships in the first place. Of course, that is itself a feat of rationality over human nature, so maybe we should organize our society to guide us to the right decisions. This is why one might rationally want socially conservative laws and institutions.
notch656a 5y ago
> If it's having no job and being a grunge bum but wearing nice clothes that you scammed off someone that's what you'll see a whole lot of. If it's wealth and security of lifestyle you will see men move toward that. It is only the nature of things. Being the best at scamming or gaining wealth may not be a worthy goal, but it shows you can be good at something. Merely being able to become good enough at something to beat out 90 or 99% of the population who are actively trying to achieve the same ends, may not be completely reliable but it's not a bad indicator to find someone who can at least adapt and execute well which is a pretty good indicator of someone with the skills to ensure survival of their family (even if it means in the future the needs for survival change completely). If I had to bet on who could be the more successful software engineer for instance, I'd place my bet on the best scammer before a mediocre CS grad. I think human attractiveness has a sort of innate understanding that the task isn't so much that matters as seeing who can adapt and succeed at mastering and being the best at tasks.

quantified 5y ago

> I think there is a recent phenomenon with the younger generation to only consider physical attractiveness. I don’t think that’s recent.

quantified 5y ago

> I think there is a recent phenomenon with the younger generation to only consider physical attractiveness. I don’t think that’s recent. Unless you mean “since 1970”

elmerfud 5y ago
Agreed, I'm old
notch656a 5y ago
1970 roughly corresponds with when mass birth control was readily available, somewhat socially accepted, and fairly reliable to the entire populace ( in US). If you're not going to reproduce but just want sex, it doesn't make sense to focus on traits associated with long term survival of the family. Physical attractiveness becomes relatively more valuable. It's a completely rational choice, and human adaptation to changing sexual landscape.
- legalcorrection 5y ago
  It's not a completely rational choice. Sexual relationships tend to lead to emotional attachment. So you start sleeping with someone because they're hot, even though they are a poor prospect for marriage, but you end up falling in love with them anyway. One thing leads to another and suddenly you're married with kids. Some people are capable of exceptional rationality—or perhaps exceptional coldness and calculation—but most of us are merely middling in our capacity to act contrary to our emotional natures. So we do better by avoiding reckless sexual relationships in the first place. Of course, that is itself a feat of rationality over human nature, so maybe we should organize our society to guide us to the right decisions. This is why one might rationally want socially conservative laws and institutions.

notch656a 5y ago

> If it's having no job and being a grunge bum but wearing nice clothes that you scammed off someone that's what you'll see a whole lot of. If it's wealth and security of lifestyle you will see men move toward that. It is only the nature of things. Being the best at scamming or gaining wealth may not be a worthy goal, but it shows you can be good at something. Merely being able to become good enough at something to beat out 90 or 99% of the population who are actively trying to achieve the same ends, may not be completely reliable but it's not a bad indicator to find someone who can at least adapt and execute well which is a pretty good indicator of someone with the skills to ensure survival of their family (even if it means in the future the needs for survival change completely). If I had to bet on who could be the more successful software engineer for instance, I'd place my bet on the best scammer before a mediocre CS grad. I think human attractiveness has a sort of innate understanding that the task isn't so much that matters as seeing who can adapt and succeed at mastering and being the best at tasks.