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I've made this experience with regional offices having a vastly different culture from the main office. In one place I was extremely happy to be able to work r

I've made this experience with regional offices having a vastly different culture from the main office. In one place I was extremely happy to be able to work remote, becauase using bathrooms in their office (either, really) turned into rolling a dice of risking awkward confrontation always brushed off when I dared talk about it in my HR JF. Sometimes these conversations turn comical, because the "direction" I'm transitioning isn't obvious to some people, leading me into being gatekept from the _wrong_ facility. Of course that problem exists in most public places as a non-passing trans person, but I'd at least be spared from this at work.

sdoering 5y ago
I am trying actively to understand experiences like these to be part of a better workplace culture/experience. What I often find difficult is how to approach these subjects from a position of genuine interest without putting people off. Without being insensitive. I know there is no "cookbook" of talking to other people. But sometimes I wish to me it were more easy to share and learn.
- sascha_sl 5y ago
  When I came out, the company I was working for at the time attempted to put me in a "working group for dealing with trans people". I begrundingly agreed to this, but it turned out they didn't want me as an advisor. I dug out precedent for name change without a legal change (it's nearly impossible here); they dismissed it and then spent the rest of the meeting telling me they'd have to ask all the women on the floor if they were comfortable with me using the restroom. (I had not requested that whatsoever, i did not male-fail at that point). I handed them a copy of the SAP guidelines[1] (this was a much smaller company than SAP) and bailed. If you want to do it right, hire a real consultant. Thankfully a few months later there was a change of leadership, and my name was changed in Slack/AD with no problems whatsoever. 1: https://www.charta-der-vielfalt.de/uploads/tx_dreipccdvdiversity/Richtlinien%20zur%20Geschlechtsangleichung.pdf https://www.charta-der-vielfalt.de/uploads/tx_dreipccdvdiver...

sdoering 5y ago

I am trying actively to understand experiences like these to be part of a better workplace culture/experience. What I often find difficult is how to approach these subjects from a position of genuine interest without putting people off. Without being insensitive. I know there is no "cookbook" of talking to other people. But sometimes I wish to me it were more easy to share and learn.

sascha_sl 5y ago
When I came out, the company I was working for at the time attempted to put me in a "working group for dealing with trans people". I begrundingly agreed to this, but it turned out they didn't want me as an advisor. I dug out precedent for name change without a legal change (it's nearly impossible here); they dismissed it and then spent the rest of the meeting telling me they'd have to ask all the women on the floor if they were comfortable with me using the restroom. (I had not requested that whatsoever, i did not male-fail at that point). I handed them a copy of the SAP guidelines[1] (this was a much smaller company than SAP) and bailed. If you want to do it right, hire a real consultant. Thankfully a few months later there was a change of leadership, and my name was changed in Slack/AD with no problems whatsoever. 1: https://www.charta-der-vielfalt.de/uploads/tx_dreipccdvdiversity/Richtlinien%20zur%20Geschlechtsangleichung.pdf https://www.charta-der-vielfalt.de/uploads/tx_dreipccdvdiver...