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If you're asking a quick, informational, easy thing, then "Hi! What is the test server name?" is good. But dropping something upfront that is ambiguous or requ

by jmull 5y ago

If you're asking a quick, informational, easy thing, then "Hi! What is the test server name?" is good. But dropping something upfront that is ambiguous or requiring thought isn't great. If you drop a thorny problem on someone, you may kind of force a context change on them, causing them to drop their train of thought and focus on what you need instead. You can pre-compose your longer thought/question. Then paste it once any pleasantries are over and you have the other person's attention. They don't need to wait for your typing and you can take your time to compose the right message, if you need it.

svet_0 5y ago
"Hi, got some questions regarding ComplexProject, ping me when you have a few minutes to spare."
unfocussed_mike 5y ago
> You can pre-compose your longer thought/question. Then paste it once any pleasantries are over and you have the other person's attention. They don't need to wait for your typing and you can take your time to compose the right message, if you need it. Exactly. This is what I do, and advise people to do when they say "argh the web chat was so annoying". Plan your requests, but be cordial.
pas 5y ago
it's on the other party to defend their attention/focus. preemptively witholding information doesn't lead to a global optimum
- jmull 5y ago
  > it's on the other party to defend their attention/focus. Conducting communication as an adversarial process is *going to fail*.
  - pas 5y ago
    Of course, but different people have wildly different ideas on how to initiate and conduct cooperative communication. Just consider how some people have a hard time to say no, while other people have a hard time to express what that they want something, etc. (Cultural differences and stereotypes are alive and well.) Fundamentally there's a basic need to protect one's own resources needed for a healthy psyche. And unfortunately this is very much "left as an exercise to the reader" in many (almost all?) cultures around the world. And the unsurprising result is that many people are taken advantage of by those who exploit the lack of the aforementioned psychological skills.

by jmull 5y ago

svet_0 5y ago

"Hi, got some questions regarding ComplexProject, ping me when you have a few minutes to spare."

unfocussed_mike 5y ago

> You can pre-compose your longer thought/question. Then paste it once any pleasantries are over and you have the other person's attention. They don't need to wait for your typing and you can take your time to compose the right message, if you need it. Exactly. This is what I do, and advise people to do when they say "argh the web chat was so annoying". Plan your requests, but be cordial.

pas 5y ago

it's on the other party to defend their attention/focus. preemptively witholding information doesn't lead to a global optimum

jmull 5y ago
> it's on the other party to defend their attention/focus. Conducting communication as an adversarial process is *going to fail*.
- pas 5y ago
  Of course, but different people have wildly different ideas on how to initiate and conduct cooperative communication. Just consider how some people have a hard time to say no, while other people have a hard time to express what that they want something, etc. (Cultural differences and stereotypes are alive and well.) Fundamentally there's a basic need to protect one's own resources needed for a healthy psyche. And unfortunately this is very much "left as an exercise to the reader" in many (almost all?) cultures around the world. And the unsurprising result is that many people are taken advantage of by those who exploit the lack of the aforementioned psychological skills.