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"How are you doing?", 90% of the time it's said, is social coding for either "I exist, acknowledge me before I continue" or "I see you exist, may I continue?" I
by IceMetalPunk 5y ago
"How are you doing?", 90% of the time it's said, is social coding for either "I exist, acknowledge me before I continue" or "I see you exist, may I continue?" It's literally the human equivalent of a file existence check.
- ravenstine 5y agoI totally get that, and as someone who grew up in LA I'm accustomed to a frequency of pretense. To me personally, "how are you" and "what's up" are complicated questions no matter what mood I'm in. Where I live, if you respond with anything other than "good" or "great", they look at you funny even if they know you. Heaven forbid saying you're just "okay", because then you might need to see a therapist. /s Besides, not every culture uses phatic expressions all the time and somehow their civilizations don't collapse. It's a matter of taste, and I'm not a fan.
- scruple 5y ago> To me personally, "how are you" and "what's up" are complicated questions no matter what mood I'm in. Where I live, if you respond with anything other than "good" or "great", they look at you funny even if they know you. Heaven forbid saying you're just "okay", because then you might need to see a therapist. /s Reminds me of the "How To Talk Minnesotan" video. [0] I'm a Midwestern transplant to SoCal and getting hit with "How's it going?" or the equivalent still gives me anxiety, 15 years later... [0]: https://youtu.be/oiSzwoJr4-0?t=478 https://youtu.be/oiSzwoJr4-0?t=478