3 ms·

As a fairly blackpilled guy who isn't a feminist, I'll try to avoid being too controversial. "But I wonder if the dating apps, with their illusion of endless p

As a fairly blackpilled guy who isn't a feminist, I'll try to avoid being too controversial. "But I wonder if the dating apps, with their illusion of endless possibility, subtly encourage us to keep shooting for the best of all worlds" Ah yes: the paradox of choice. By having many more, and better, things to choose from you end up less satisfied than if you had fewer choices. "Today there are three men for every four women with degrees. Put simply, there aren’t enough highly educated men to go around." I'd argue that it's only a problem if you make it a problem, though. When the positions were reversed, men never argued that there were too few highly-educated women. Women want to date up. Now that they are achieving greater parity with men, men are seen as less attractive. I believe it was Germaine Greer who said this, which hits the nail on the head: If it wasn't for their looks, 90% of women would be of no interest to men. If it wasn't for their money, 90% of men would be of no interest to women. I'll leave things there for now.

toomuchtodo 5y ago
I don’t think you’ve said anything terribly controversial. Men weren’t picky (they date down, because they value other factors besides education and ambition), women are picky, and there just aren’t enough men they desire to go around. Expectations minus reality equals happiness. Adjust your expectations if that’s required to meet your happiness objectives, otherwise be comfortable being single.
kar5pt 5y ago
I never understood the hang-up around women with degrees not wanting to date men without degrees. I've met plenty of people with Psychology/Biology degrees who wait tables and I've met plenty of people with advanced degrees who were complete morons. I don't think the binary data point of degree/no degree is the best signal for intelligence or earning potential.
- ravenstine 5y ago
  When evaluating popular media and especially that which is popular with women, it's not too surprising. How are "uneducated" men portrayed in the media? They're clumsy stupid goofballs. Even the fictional men with degrees are often portrayed as aloof and not knowing what a woman wants. Entertainment aside, growing up I was told that a college degree is the only way to make any real money, and I know for a fact that young people are still taught this. If her parents insist she go to university, why would she come home with some trade school bum when she believes her parents think she's better than that?
Zababa 5y ago
> "Today there are three men for every four women with degrees. Put simply, there aren’t enough highly educated men to go around." I'll admit that I find it disturbing that having 3 men with degrees for 4 women with degrees is a problem because women can't date at an "equivalent degree level", and not because of the huge differences in opportunities related to gender. It's like saying the wage gap is a problem because men have a hard time finding women that earn as much as them. That would be a weird view on things.
no_time 5y ago
>As a fairly blackpilled guy Putting labels like this on yourself may give you some comfort, but it also come with way more toxic thought patterns that will ultimately make your life worse. And I mean this in a non condescending way. I have been there before.

toomuchtodo 5y ago

I don’t think you’ve said anything terribly controversial. Men weren’t picky (they date down, because they value other factors besides education and ambition), women are picky, and there just aren’t enough men they desire to go around. Expectations minus reality equals happiness. Adjust your expectations if that’s required to meet your happiness objectives, otherwise be comfortable being single.

kar5pt 5y ago

I never understood the hang-up around women with degrees not wanting to date men without degrees. I've met plenty of people with Psychology/Biology degrees who wait tables and I've met plenty of people with advanced degrees who were complete morons. I don't think the binary data point of degree/no degree is the best signal for intelligence or earning potential.

ravenstine 5y ago
When evaluating popular media and especially that which is popular with women, it's not too surprising. How are "uneducated" men portrayed in the media? They're clumsy stupid goofballs. Even the fictional men with degrees are often portrayed as aloof and not knowing what a woman wants. Entertainment aside, growing up I was told that a college degree is the only way to make any real money, and I know for a fact that young people are still taught this. If her parents insist she go to university, why would she come home with some trade school bum when she believes her parents think she's better than that?

Zababa 5y ago

> "Today there are three men for every four women with degrees. Put simply, there aren’t enough highly educated men to go around." I'll admit that I find it disturbing that having 3 men with degrees for 4 women with degrees is a problem because women can't date at an "equivalent degree level", and not because of the huge differences in opportunities related to gender. It's like saying the wage gap is a problem because men have a hard time finding women that earn as much as them. That would be a weird view on things.

no_time 5y ago

>As a fairly blackpilled guy Putting labels like this on yourself may give you some comfort, but it also come with way more toxic thought patterns that will ultimately make your life worse. And I mean this in a non condescending way. I have been there before.