6 ms·

Genuinely asking, as someone who frames my own circumstances similarly, what would you say is a healthy way to frame things?

sugarpile 5y ago
Fwiw I disagree with it being unhealthy and I view myself the same way. It IS lucky that my only hobby/interest I’ve ever really had also happens to be something that pays so well. Nothing unhealthy about recognizing one’s luck and being correspondingly grateful for it.
- MichaelConlon 5y ago
  Just throwing another opinion in the mix. I think it's healthy to recognize one's own work in addition to that dumb luck. It's certainly lucky that we liked computers but it's also true that a lot of us worked hard and took advantage of our lucky situations. That's not to say we succeeded on hard work alone, far from it - luck is a crucial part, but it's also unfair to not give yourself a little credit sometimes.
tjader 5y ago
I would say it's unhealthy to think of it as only luck. It's luck that you like something that is sought after in the job market. But actually spending years learning about it, and sometimes learning things you may not like so much because they are needed for the job, takes effort.
- nicoburns 5y ago
  > actually spending years learning about it, I mean, I did this for fun while I was still in high school. Did I put in a lot of hours? Yes. Were there some frustrating bits? Sure. But I know plenty of people who had to put far more work in to get mediocre grades in their high school qualifications than I've ever put into learning programming.
jostylr 5y ago
Being willing to take advantage of the luck by working hard, taking risks, having a vision as to how to succeed and be useful. It is very much about empowering both yourself and others. The luck part is there to help prevent the "I did this, why didn't you?" crappy privileged perspective, but it needs to be balanced with the drive. As an example, over a decade ago, I quit a job with no plans of getting another one. Someone I knew told me about an opportunity (luck / connections), and I pursued it. It was hard at first, but now it is almost a turn-key operation. Still requires work, but far less than it did at the beginning. It has netted me a good tidy sum which has been crucial for living the life I want. Was it luck? Absolutely. Was it my own ability, hard work, and willingness to take that step? Yes. What would have happened had I said no? No idea, but probably less of a good outcome. Ideally, one tries to frame one's life to be empowering but not arrogant, not trivializing the difficulty of other's paths. Luck is not empowering. Belief that hard work alone can get you to the height is not empowering. Some mixture of these things, that can be empowering. Understanding that the goal is to be useful to others as well as yourself, that's really empowering.
seabird 5y ago
Framing any and all success (maybe not what OP is doing, but a lot of people do this so it's probably worth addressing) as "sheer dumb luck" implies that you think there's a lot of things in your life that are outside your control when they really aren't. The OP may have deliberately chose that wording to convey that _in their case_, their love for computers was something they pursued completely and entirely ignorant of it being a high-demand/high-paying field. There's a lot of people that have convinced themselves that the odds of them getting a well paying job and doing better for themselves are approaching zero, for no reason other than believing that the only way to have that happen is to be born into it or to have "sheer dumb luck". That prophecy fulfills itself. There's luck involved, but it's only part of the story.

sugarpile 5y ago

Fwiw I disagree with it being unhealthy and I view myself the same way. It IS lucky that my only hobby/interest I’ve ever really had also happens to be something that pays so well. Nothing unhealthy about recognizing one’s luck and being correspondingly grateful for it.

MichaelConlon 5y ago
Just throwing another opinion in the mix. I think it's healthy to recognize one's own work in addition to that dumb luck. It's certainly lucky that we liked computers but it's also true that a lot of us worked hard and took advantage of our lucky situations. That's not to say we succeeded on hard work alone, far from it - luck is a crucial part, but it's also unfair to not give yourself a little credit sometimes.

tjader 5y ago

I would say it's unhealthy to think of it as only luck. It's luck that you like something that is sought after in the job market. But actually spending years learning about it, and sometimes learning things you may not like so much because they are needed for the job, takes effort.

nicoburns 5y ago
> actually spending years learning about it, I mean, I did this for fun while I was still in high school. Did I put in a lot of hours? Yes. Were there some frustrating bits? Sure. But I know plenty of people who had to put far more work in to get mediocre grades in their high school qualifications than I've ever put into learning programming.

jostylr 5y ago

Being willing to take advantage of the luck by working hard, taking risks, having a vision as to how to succeed and be useful. It is very much about empowering both yourself and others. The luck part is there to help prevent the "I did this, why didn't you?" crappy privileged perspective, but it needs to be balanced with the drive. As an example, over a decade ago, I quit a job with no plans of getting another one. Someone I knew told me about an opportunity (luck / connections), and I pursued it. It was hard at first, but now it is almost a turn-key operation. Still requires work, but far less than it did at the beginning. It has netted me a good tidy sum which has been crucial for living the life I want. Was it luck? Absolutely. Was it my own ability, hard work, and willingness to take that step? Yes. What would have happened had I said no? No idea, but probably less of a good outcome. Ideally, one tries to frame one's life to be empowering but not arrogant, not trivializing the difficulty of other's paths. Luck is not empowering. Belief that hard work alone can get you to the height is not empowering. Some mixture of these things, that can be empowering. Understanding that the goal is to be useful to others as well as yourself, that's really empowering.

seabird 5y ago

Framing any and all success (maybe not what OP is doing, but a lot of people do this so it's probably worth addressing) as "sheer dumb luck" implies that you think there's a lot of things in your life that are outside your control when they really aren't. The OP may have deliberately chose that wording to convey that _in their case_, their love for computers was something they pursued completely and entirely ignorant of it being a high-demand/high-paying field. There's a lot of people that have convinced themselves that the odds of them getting a well paying job and doing better for themselves are approaching zero, for no reason other than believing that the only way to have that happen is to be born into it or to have "sheer dumb luck". That prophecy fulfills itself. There's luck involved, but it's only part of the story.