5 ms·

I think the author is referring to a somewhat different personality type. While wet noodles will ask you to basically do their job for them, there is another pe

I think the author is referring to a somewhat different personality type. While wet noodles will ask you to basically do their job for them, there is another personality that has a confrontational, zero-sum perspective where they are constantly trying to dominate other workers. I've experienced it firsthand, and I eventually found a term for it: a "high conflict" personality [1]. There are a few ways google says you can deal with these personality types, the main one being: do not interact with that person. [1] https://www.highconflictinstitute.com/hci-articles/who-are-high-conflict-people https://www.highconflictinstitute.com/hci-articles/who-are-h...

TheOtherHobbes 5y ago
If it's a persistent pattern and not just a result of stress and poor culture - not always easy to tell - they're likely on the Dark Triad spectrum. Or at the very least they don't like you personally and are trying to bully you. It's not usually about the presented issue. The relationship dynamics are the real truth. Everyone has bad days. But if interactions consistently take this direction - especially to the point where anticipating them causes anxiety - it's time to consider moving on.
- floydian10 5y ago
  > It's not usually about the presented issue. The relationship dynamics are the real truth. Absolutely. I was on the wrong side of such a dynamic until recently, by the end of it (thankfully I switched teams) it was a straight up bullying situation. And much like an abusive romantic relationship, it escalated slowly in a way that was difficult to notice. My point is, yes, do whatever you can to stay away from these kind of people.
  - BLKNSLVR 5y ago
    If it's possible to take a positive out of it, it should mean that the signs are easier to spot earlier if, god forbid, the situation occurs again later in your career. I'm currently (this weekend) going to be applying for jobs to extricate myself from what I recognise as the early stages of exactly such a situation.

TheOtherHobbes 5y ago

If it's a persistent pattern and not just a result of stress and poor culture - not always easy to tell - they're likely on the Dark Triad spectrum. Or at the very least they don't like you personally and are trying to bully you. It's not usually about the presented issue. The relationship dynamics are the real truth. Everyone has bad days. But if interactions consistently take this direction - especially to the point where anticipating them causes anxiety - it's time to consider moving on.

floydian10 5y ago
> It's not usually about the presented issue. The relationship dynamics are the real truth. Absolutely. I was on the wrong side of such a dynamic until recently, by the end of it (thankfully I switched teams) it was a straight up bullying situation. And much like an abusive romantic relationship, it escalated slowly in a way that was difficult to notice. My point is, yes, do whatever you can to stay away from these kind of people.
- BLKNSLVR 5y ago
  If it's possible to take a positive out of it, it should mean that the signs are easier to spot earlier if, god forbid, the situation occurs again later in your career. I'm currently (this weekend) going to be applying for jobs to extricate myself from what I recognise as the early stages of exactly such a situation.