I previously had a substance abuse problem with ketamine after self medicating for depression. You're absolutely spot on, I never had any physical cravings or

I previously had a substance abuse problem with ketamine after self medicating for depression. You're absolutely spot on, I never had any physical cravings or withdrawal symptoms, as a typical addictive substance does. And when I couldn't get hold of any, or went away and couldn't use it, or something, I wasn't compelled to seek it out. But at home, it crept into becaming an "every evening" thing, then a "morning" thing, and slowly into an "all day when I could get away with it" thing. It's very, very easy to binge on ketamine. Especially in illicit powder form, administered nasally. It doesn't take a huge amount of it to render you practically senseless, and your mind is in a totally different "space" almost, a sort of limitless sense of possibility and openness, a secret, esoteric reality of your own making. At the right dose and frequency, it can fill you with a sense of awe and wonder so profound that it really does make life feel magical and wondrous, even while not on the drug. And when you emerge from that, a couple of lines and you're back there. It's powerfully psychologically addictive for that reason. Years later I was diagnosed with ADHD, and found out that this kind of substance abuse is quite common for undiagnosed adults. It's not just a quick dopamine fix, but a kind of coping mechanism against a world that you have to otherwise fight against constantly. Something like ketamine just removes that entirely, you can just exit the world for some time and float off into space, where no one can expect you to have ordered executive function. The article mentions him scoring ADHD medications; I wonder if this had more to do with it than any other factor.