3 ms·
Kids look for role models that have their own dreams, hobbies, ambitions... complete people. Parents that give up their own lives to obsess over their children
by lrvick 5y ago
Kids look for role models that have their own dreams, hobbies, ambitions... complete people.
Parents that give up their own lives to obsess over their children are often not the people a child will choose as role models, because they are boring. Kids need to see parents continually trying new things of their own choosing. They need to see them failing, and sometimes succeeding, at pursuing their own goals.
Most kids would be happier with a happy parent living their own authentic life and living in a trailer, than a parent trying too hard to provide for a "nice" home and a "good" school that a kid never asked for.
- watwut 5y agoStatistically, kids growing up in trailers don't do better then kids in nice homes. The stress of such arrangement itself, the financial insecurity is affecting both kids and parents. And also, imo, kids of parents who obsessed over kids pretty often end up obsessing over own kids. Parenting is one of those things qe tend to copy a lot. People who obsessed over kids or particular hobby or work are not incomplete. They are whole humans, just that you disaproves their values and choices. Or don't understand their psychology. Even if they are unhappy in their own arrangement, they are still whole people.
- dijit 5y agoGrew up poor, doing well financially now. It’s true that poverty is self fulfilling but economic success isn’t everything either. You can be poor and happy (and good). You can be wealthy and miserable (and immoral). I’m not saying stress is good or that people should have to struggle, but you make it sound as if misery is a foregone conclusion for those raised in lower socio-economic conditions.