Can strongly relate to both parts of this. Particularly a source of conflict when partners have different family of origin experiences— the one whose parents no

Can strongly relate to both parts of this. Particularly a source of conflict when partners have different family of origin experiences— the one whose parents normalized buying a round of drive thru coffees every Sunday on the way to church is going to really struggle to ever be frugal enough for the one who grew up eating out once or twice a year and never having take-out. "Cheaper" families can often end up developing an attitude that buying a solution to a problem instead of reusing or making do with what you have is a cop-out or sign of being bougie; it's important to be able to shed those things (with the help of a therapist, if necessary) rather than bringing them into a relationship where they erode trust and safety. On the other side of things, a lot of upper middle class families think of themselves as "not rich" so that can be an adjustment to look back and recognize that oh yeah... I kind of was well-off wasn't I, and part of the privilege of wealth/class is actually being shielded from the full reality of it and just thinking of whatever your experience was as being normal. Anyway, one of the keys I think is explicitly acknowledging the transitions to different tiers of financial security as they happen. Otherwise a lot of that early stress/judgment/anxiety can hold over from the early years until long past the point where any of it really matters any more. A few $5 treats a week is a way bigger deal when the household income is $50k than when it's $150k.