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I think as a parent it's also important to set the standard for your kids by doing the same thing. If they need to charge their phones overnight in the kitchen,

• irrational 5y ago
  >then you should do the same too. No. My phone is my alarm system. It is what wakes me up at 5:20am every morning to start things going. My wife uses hers for white noise.
  • danieljacksonno 5y ago
    I use my apple watch for this. That said, you can easily buy a simple analog alarm for a few bucks.
  • saagarjha 5y ago
    Ok, but why shouldn’t your kids be able to also use them in similar ways?
    • amflare 5y ago
      Because they are children. They get to have fewer responsibilities in return for having fewer freedoms while they grow up and gain experience.
      • saagarjha 5y ago
        I know if I was a child, I would be upset that you get to take your phone into your bedroom and use it for useful things. I understand that this is OK for some parents, but the whole point of the comment above the one I was responding to was that children react positively to consistent applications of the rules, and the comment was basically "I have valid uses for my devices (but this is not true for my children)".
        • PathOfEclipse 5y ago
          It's not that you have valid uses for your devices. It's that you trust yourself with the self-control to not to use the devices improperly or in ways that could be self-harmful, or, if so, to be able to bear the consequences. Adults can also drive, but children can't. There is no inconsistency there, either. Writing as a parent who has had to deal with children staying up late at night, way after they should be sleeping, and looking up things on devices that I would consider inappropriate for both children and adults.
          • dijonman2 5y ago
            > It's that you trust yourself with the self-control to not to use the devices improperly or in ways that could be self-harmful, or, if so, to be able to bear the consequences. This sounds like something an addict would say. Not calling you out as an individual but instead highlighting the dangers of “I can stop anytime I want”.
        • nickpeterson 5y ago
          I think you’re inadvertently propping up another idea, that all rules apply equally to children and adults. This is obviously not true.
        • moistly 5y ago
          Were you upset that your parents got to drink booze and you didn’t? That they got to watch nighttime (e.g. adult) TV? Drive the car? Stay up late? Have sex? Adults have myriad privileges that children do not. It is not unfair.
          • onli 5y ago
            Of course that's unfair. Always has been.
            • moistly 5y ago
              Please explain, because IMO that is a ridiculously stupid statement: to paraphrase your claim, “of course it’s unfair that children don’t get to fuck/fly airplanes/etc. Always has been.” Surely you meant something else.
    • stjohnswarts 5y ago
      Because kids lack almost all control when it comes to entertainment and talking to friends and their brains aren't fully formed. I have a screen time timer set for my phone. After 1 hour each day I don't use it for anything fun after that hour is up. My kids aren't going to be able to handle that with personal discipline. Before you ask, yeah I've tried, the only way is to force them to surrender their devices at a reasonable time at night like 8pm.
      • saagarjha 5y ago
        So it sounds like you gave them an opportunity to use their devices productively, and they couldn't, so they don't get to use your phone. Had you not been able to do that, your screen time would kick in and do the same to you. Seems reasonable to me?
        • stjohnswarts 5y ago
          I did, I watched very closely (and took estimated times) for a couple weeks and they were obsessed a couple years back. All they wanted to do was be on the phone or switch. If you close some doors then other doors will open up. Board games, actually sitting down and telling their day to me (and their mom), playing with the cats and dog. Etc. I give them a lot of freedom until around 8, everyone needs personal time that they own, including kids, then it's back to business of being a family and homework.
    • brnt 5y ago
      You are aware impulse control is something that takes a decade or two (or more) to acquire? Most kids simply can't use them just in those similar ways.
    • irrational 5y ago
      Because, when it's my bed time, I go to bed. I know that I have responsibilities that require me to get a full nights sleep. The kids? It doesn't matter if they know that they have to diffuse a nuclear bomb in the morning. They will stay up all night on their devices if given the chance and then let the world burn. Their brains are not ready yet. That is why they have parents.
  • andruby 5y ago
    That’s easy to fix with a $15 alarm clock.
    • watwut 5y ago
      O would rather model not wasting money unnecessary
      • andruby 5y ago
        Is spending $15 on an alarm clock wasting money? That thing will probably last a decade or two and outlive a couple of phone generations. You’ll get to lead by example and perhaps even improve your sleep.
        • ohyoutravel 5y ago
          Buying a second thing to unnecessarily duplicate functionality seems like a waste, even if the thing by itself would otherwise be a solid deal.
          • kelnos 5y ago
            That depends on whether or not you'd consider "setting an example for your kids" in this particular way as necessary or not. If you think that's valuable, then this isn't an unnecessary duplicate. If not, then sure.
          • hypertele-Xii 5y ago
            As opposed to a fancy gizmo that does everything but has to be replaced every three years due to lack of support?
            • watwut 5y ago
              1.) I replace phone when they are too broken, not on schedule. 2.) I need phone anyway. And even old flip phones had alarm. Phone with alarm does not need to be fancy at all.
  • aprinsen 5y ago
    This has really got me thinking about the hidden costs of having one high tech device that does everything. Like, I wonder if someone is running ML models on all of our sleeping habits based on phone alarms. Would be interesting to get some of the telemetry/tracking output from the clocks app.
    • throw3838 5y ago
      Or just install opensource ROM without this stuff.
• stjohnswarts 5y ago
  Kids need to learn that we all have roles to play, not everything is egalitarian. Edit: for the downvoters, you're the problem with the education system and parenting, your kids aren't little adults, they need some guidance and boundaries to learn a bit of self-control.
• chmod600 5y ago
  When a child asks for X, they are not really asking for X. They are asking for X, and for you to deal with any consequences of that action, regardless of how poorly-executed. When you do X you are also dealing with the consequences, so it's really no concern of theirs. Mentioning that a parent gets to do X while they do not is just a way for a child to score a point against foolish parents in an argument. You are right to a degree. Clearly a parent can lose credibility by being too hypocritical. But you shouldn't feel any general obligation to treat children as adults or yourself as a child.
• justnotworthit 5y ago
  People will misinterpret you, but if something is bad for you at any age, then the parent should be taking their own advice. "If you can't do it with self-control, then don't do it, or find a way to make it work..." applies to everyone, regardless of roles. No, you don't have to wear pajamas and sleep the same times they do, but you cant tell them how healthy it is to get a full night's sleep with the screen down if you're (frivously) harming your own sleep.