I'm not sure how you made the leap from "lasting relationships require work" ---> "lasting relationships are inherently abusive and rapey". All relationships r

I'm not sure how you made the leap from "lasting relationships require work" ---> "lasting relationships are inherently abusive and rapey". All relationships require upkeep. If you never make any time for a friend, the friendship deteriorates. You need to make time for each other and show each other that you care. The fact that you see this as abusive is perhaps revealing why marriage and lasting relationships are at an all time low.