3 ms·

Maybe they should teach self esteem and resiliency in the face of criticism and failure, because you will definitely be criticized and you'll definitely fail. Y

Maybe they should teach self esteem and resiliency in the face of criticism and failure, because you will definitely be criticized and you'll definitely fail. You will face setbacks and discouragement at many points in your life. More often than not, your biggest critic will be yourself. That much is certain. This wasn't even really intentional discouragement, but it was perceived as such. Hopefully, you learned the higher lesson.

PuppyTailWags 5y ago
You can have plenty of self esteem and resiliency and also decide based on evidence that an activity may not be the best use of your time. If you respect a teacher's evaluation of your performance in a subject and the teacher's evaluation is that you don't have the maturity to learn from them, it may make much more sense to try other things than insist on forcing them to teach you anyways. People don't have to intend to say cruel things in order to be cruel-- for example, you don't have to intend to hurt someone who recently miscarried by talking about your successful pregnancy and its definitely not considered the fault of the person who is grieving. Similarly a professor doesn't have to intend to be discouraging in order to be discouraging.
fleetwoodsnack 5y ago
I think we can reasonably argue that the statement is overdetermined. Charitably, perhaps the professor did mean mathematical maturity in the sense of "try learning some background first, and give yourself the time to let your skills and intuition develop." Uncharitably, perhaps the professor did not, and meant mathematical maturity in the sense of, "you have an inherent deficiency that makes this an inappropriate undertaking for you." I think where the fruit of this discussion may be is deciding to what degree an authority figure like a professor has a responsibility or an obligation to their students and advisees to make themselves clear which way they intend their statements to be interpreted. Personally, this begets a discussion of the nuances between the obligations and responsibilities of communication between (1) strangers, (2) peers/colleagues, and (3) authority figures and their charges.

PuppyTailWags 5y ago

You can have plenty of self esteem and resiliency and also decide based on evidence that an activity may not be the best use of your time. If you respect a teacher's evaluation of your performance in a subject and the teacher's evaluation is that you don't have the maturity to learn from them, it may make much more sense to try other things than insist on forcing them to teach you anyways. People don't have to intend to say cruel things in order to be cruel-- for example, you don't have to intend to hurt someone who recently miscarried by talking about your successful pregnancy and its definitely not considered the fault of the person who is grieving. Similarly a professor doesn't have to intend to be discouraging in order to be discouraging.

fleetwoodsnack 5y ago

I think we can reasonably argue that the statement is overdetermined. Charitably, perhaps the professor did mean mathematical maturity in the sense of "try learning some background first, and give yourself the time to let your skills and intuition develop." Uncharitably, perhaps the professor did not, and meant mathematical maturity in the sense of, "you have an inherent deficiency that makes this an inappropriate undertaking for you." I think where the fruit of this discussion may be is deciding to what degree an authority figure like a professor has a responsibility or an obligation to their students and advisees to make themselves clear which way they intend their statements to be interpreted. Personally, this begets a discussion of the nuances between the obligations and responsibilities of communication between (1) strangers, (2) peers/colleagues, and (3) authority figures and their charges.