So...in some ways, you've "arrived" while at the same time recognize your time left to travel is shorter and, probably worse, you are realizing you aren't sure

So...in some ways, you've "arrived" while at the same time recognize your time left to travel is shorter and, probably worse, you are realizing you aren't sure where to go or if traveling itself is even worthwhile. You mention a relationship but, while a traveling companion might be a good idea and a blessing, it's unlikely to alleviate the things you are experiencing. I'm 41, been married for almost 20 years to a good woman who is a blessing to me, and it's not a cure to the things you are feeling and thinking. But, thankfully, I learned a long time ago that none of these things would every truly satisfy. It's not kept me from feeling and thinking similar things, putts just help put them in perspective. I'd encourage you to read the biblical book Ecclesiastes[1] to help verify and understand your current experience. If you are then interested, move to the gospel of Luke, gospel of John, and Romans to help understand what is truly important in life. 1. https://www.esv.org/Ecclesiastes+1/ https://www.esv.org/Ecclesiastes+1/