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> If you reach a certain age and are still childless just know that nearly everyone will feel sorry for you I legitimately do not care if people "feel sorry fo

> If you reach a certain age and are still childless just know that nearly everyone will feel sorry for you I legitimately do not care if people "feel sorry for me". I have good reasons for choosing not to have kids, and I hate the attitude that I'm somehow selfish or missing out on the "true meaning of life". Life is ultimately meaningless with or without kids. That allows you to make your own meaning, and kids are not a requirement for that. There's this attitude that people who don't have kids are in some way selfish, but in my experience, the act of having kids can be the selfish one, especially if you are not in the position to be a good parent, for whatever reason. Many people have kids in that attempt to find meaning for themselves, not to actually be a good parent. As a society, we need to be much better at not pushing every single person into being a parent. It just doesn't work for many people. And that's okay. > The world does not revolve around single people...at all Plenty of single people have kids, though?

arisAlexis 5y ago
Its in the code. If many people thought like you our species would be extinct. The people that have this software version is the majority and any argument you make will not alter the code. Their code includes convincing others to make kids.
- Trasmatta 5y ago
  The way I think isn't "people shouldn't don't have kids", it's "don't force yourself to have kids if you don't want them, and don't expect kids to be the path to solving your own problems -- they may, in fact, just magnify every problem you have". I'm fairly certain that even everyone agreeing with that wouldn't lead to the extinction of the species, but it may lead to less children being raised in dire or abusive circumstances, and less parents miserable with their own existence. I agree that this way of thinking probably runs contrary to the evolutionary code of the species. But we live in a world where that code is outdated, and education should allow us to teach people that marriage and child-rearing, while the right path for many people, is not the only route to self fulfillment and happiness. And those that choose alternate paths should not be treated as, or feel like, outcasts.
  - arisAlexis 5y ago
    I agree

arisAlexis 5y ago

Its in the code. If many people thought like you our species would be extinct. The people that have this software version is the majority and any argument you make will not alter the code. Their code includes convincing others to make kids.

Trasmatta 5y ago
The way I think isn't "people shouldn't don't have kids", it's "don't force yourself to have kids if you don't want them, and don't expect kids to be the path to solving your own problems -- they may, in fact, just magnify every problem you have". I'm fairly certain that even everyone agreeing with that wouldn't lead to the extinction of the species, but it may lead to less children being raised in dire or abusive circumstances, and less parents miserable with their own existence. I agree that this way of thinking probably runs contrary to the evolutionary code of the species. But we live in a world where that code is outdated, and education should allow us to teach people that marriage and child-rearing, while the right path for many people, is not the only route to self fulfillment and happiness. And those that choose alternate paths should not be treated as, or feel like, outcasts.
- arisAlexis 5y ago
  I agree