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I do not mean to tear down OP, but you are 35 and have $500k in savings. You lived in other countries, had startups and worked at a big company. You are not los

I do not mean to tear down OP, but you are 35 and have $500k in savings. You lived in other countries, had startups and worked at a big company. You are not lost, you are one of the 1%. It sounds like you did a lot and now "normal" life that the rest of have to go through seems sucky. It is. I have years of experience, not 1/5th your savings, have not traveled and now I am actually too old for "big company" to hire me. This is not said for you to fell for me, go feel good about yourself. It sounds like you did a lot. Figure out now what makes you _feel_ good inside and pursue that (you know, unless its spending all of your savings on vices). Time is running out? Come back here and say that twenty years from now. I think life was just starting for a lot of people when they hit 35.

amznbyebyebye 5y ago
Wow I just wanted to say thanks for this comment.
xwdv 5y ago
Although life starts for a lot of people at 35, I envy those people who are able to start much earlier. These are the people who have their first relationships in high school and college, find their life partner in early twenties, get the right job, a house, kids, keep their friend circle, invest money as early as possible, god damn. They live perfect fuckin lives and it’s all because they bravely jumped in and embraced life early on and focused on relationships with the people around them rather than mope around being shy, playing too many video games, jacking off into oblivion, wasting time chasing startup ideas that were never gonna go anywhere…
- dhimes 5y ago
  Sometimes they also get lucky. IMHO, to actually find the right partner for you in your early 20s is damn lucky.
  - datavirtue 5y ago
    My wife and I have been together since we were 16. Damn lucky. Watching all the people we know on Facebook looks like some kind of hellscape.
- jebarker 5y ago
  > They live perfect fuckin lives Do they though? Everyone has their own demons to contend with and seemingly perfect lives frequently fall apart further down the road due to regrets and pent-up frustrations.
  - xwdv 5y ago
    Everyone has demons, even perfect people have perfect little demons. But as a person who has lived a broken life, I guarantee you my demons are far larger and more monstrous than theirs. My demons would eat their demons for protein.
- escapedmoose 5y ago
  At 28, this describes me exactly. Found my partner in college, bought a nice 4-bedroom house in a nice area close to friends/family. Financially stable with plenty of time to spend on creative hobbies. We both “jumped in” to moderately lucrative careers early and are now in very comfortable positions at companies that more or less contribute to the good. By all appearances a perfect life which truly results in many days of happiness. It still feels empty/pointless. I’m too embarrassed to complain to those around me, but sometimes I wish I could buy into religion or child-rearing so that I would have a pre-manufactured purpose, and wouldn’t have to keep searching for one constantly. I think when the pandemic is over we’ll try traveling more to see if that scratches the itch.
  - xwdv 5y ago
    The reason you feel this way is because you’ve never been on the other side. Imagine reaching mid thirties, no more friends, no partner, no real prospects, and getting older is making it harder to attract quality females. Your only source of somewhat human interaction is writing on the internet. It is a life of quiet desperation. There is only one goal, to accumulate money, watch graphs go up and to the right. Money is the only way to have relevance in this society, the only salvation from becoming invisible in the dating pool. And I know money can’t really make you happy, but it’s the only thing that has truly taken care of me over the years. Would you really trade your life for this? You found someone thing good, hold onto it. It will all be over soon enough one day.
    - escapedmoose 5y ago
      I haven't been on the other side, and I think I mentioned that I feel silly complaining about this life. But my version of life also feels like "a life of quiet desperation." I suppose it's better with a partner than it would be without, just as it's better with money than without, but that feels like splitting hairs in the face of existential meaninglessness.
      - xwdv 5y ago
        Do you have an idea of what your ideal life would be?
- Wiseacre 5y ago
- nobodyofnote 5y ago
  I would be careful with that line of thinking. We often envy illusion. We don't truly know that 'those people' are living nearly as wonderful a life as we're inclined to think they are. Further, in my experience, the "perfect life" is always one moment away from "disaster" - be it a health complication, sudden loss, or any of the myriad of ways things go awry. Pain and suffering is not something any of us seems likely to avoid in this life, and inflicting misery upon ourselves due to comparison with what is likely projected fantasy is just one of its many shades.
  - tayo42 5y ago
    i mean the gist of the post is right most things are better then > rather than mope around being shy, playing too many video games, jacking off into oblivion, even if their lives are not perfect there are better ways to spend your time then this
    - rchaud 5y ago
      Precisely. The OP is describing himself as a stereotype of Redditor/4Chan user. You can be unhappy without reducing your daily life to a meme.
- rchaud 5y ago
  I used to think this way, especially after attending weddings of friends who've been together since their early 20s. Recently, one of those 'perfect' couples got divorced. Two attractive, charismatic, financially set individuals who couldn't make it work anymore. Together 10 years, living together for 5, married for 4. Part of the issue for them is that they both feel they didn't explore their options enough when they were young and attractive (they still are). It's a different problem than those faced by people who barely enjoyed romantic lives growing up. But for them, it turned out to be a big enough to end their marriage.
goodpoint 5y ago
> You are not lost, you are one of the 1%. Please don't dismiss OP so quickly. One person can very well be lost *because* they are in the 1%. Things like starting a career and putting your abilities to test can be a huge motivator. Once you reach such goals live can suddenly turn meaningless for many people.
gernb 5y ago
What's your age? I know several people between 55-60 that got hired at FAAMG companies

amznbyebyebye 5y ago

Wow I just wanted to say thanks for this comment.

xwdv 5y ago

Although life starts for a lot of people at 35, I envy those people who are able to start much earlier. These are the people who have their first relationships in high school and college, find their life partner in early twenties, get the right job, a house, kids, keep their friend circle, invest money as early as possible, god damn. They live perfect fuckin lives and it’s all because they bravely jumped in and embraced life early on and focused on relationships with the people around them rather than mope around being shy, playing too many video games, jacking off into oblivion, wasting time chasing startup ideas that were never gonna go anywhere…

dhimes 5y ago
Sometimes they also get lucky. IMHO, to actually find the right partner for you in your early 20s is damn lucky.
- datavirtue 5y ago
  My wife and I have been together since we were 16. Damn lucky. Watching all the people we know on Facebook looks like some kind of hellscape.
jebarker 5y ago
> They live perfect fuckin lives Do they though? Everyone has their own demons to contend with and seemingly perfect lives frequently fall apart further down the road due to regrets and pent-up frustrations.
- xwdv 5y ago
  Everyone has demons, even perfect people have perfect little demons. But as a person who has lived a broken life, I guarantee you my demons are far larger and more monstrous than theirs. My demons would eat their demons for protein.
escapedmoose 5y ago
At 28, this describes me exactly. Found my partner in college, bought a nice 4-bedroom house in a nice area close to friends/family. Financially stable with plenty of time to spend on creative hobbies. We both “jumped in” to moderately lucrative careers early and are now in very comfortable positions at companies that more or less contribute to the good. By all appearances a perfect life which truly results in many days of happiness. It still feels empty/pointless. I’m too embarrassed to complain to those around me, but sometimes I wish I could buy into religion or child-rearing so that I would have a pre-manufactured purpose, and wouldn’t have to keep searching for one constantly. I think when the pandemic is over we’ll try traveling more to see if that scratches the itch.
- xwdv 5y ago
  The reason you feel this way is because you’ve never been on the other side. Imagine reaching mid thirties, no more friends, no partner, no real prospects, and getting older is making it harder to attract quality females. Your only source of somewhat human interaction is writing on the internet. It is a life of quiet desperation. There is only one goal, to accumulate money, watch graphs go up and to the right. Money is the only way to have relevance in this society, the only salvation from becoming invisible in the dating pool. And I know money can’t really make you happy, but it’s the only thing that has truly taken care of me over the years. Would you really trade your life for this? You found someone thing good, hold onto it. It will all be over soon enough one day.
  - escapedmoose 5y ago
    I haven't been on the other side, and I think I mentioned that I feel silly complaining about this life. But my version of life also feels like "a life of quiet desperation." I suppose it's better with a partner than it would be without, just as it's better with money than without, but that feels like splitting hairs in the face of existential meaninglessness.
    - xwdv 5y ago
      Do you have an idea of what your ideal life would be?
Wiseacre 5y ago
nobodyofnote 5y ago
I would be careful with that line of thinking. We often envy illusion. We don't truly know that 'those people' are living nearly as wonderful a life as we're inclined to think they are. Further, in my experience, the "perfect life" is always one moment away from "disaster" - be it a health complication, sudden loss, or any of the myriad of ways things go awry. Pain and suffering is not something any of us seems likely to avoid in this life, and inflicting misery upon ourselves due to comparison with what is likely projected fantasy is just one of its many shades.
- tayo42 5y ago
  i mean the gist of the post is right most things are better then > rather than mope around being shy, playing too many video games, jacking off into oblivion, even if their lives are not perfect there are better ways to spend your time then this
  - rchaud 5y ago
    Precisely. The OP is describing himself as a stereotype of Redditor/4Chan user. You can be unhappy without reducing your daily life to a meme.
rchaud 5y ago
I used to think this way, especially after attending weddings of friends who've been together since their early 20s. Recently, one of those 'perfect' couples got divorced. Two attractive, charismatic, financially set individuals who couldn't make it work anymore. Together 10 years, living together for 5, married for 4. Part of the issue for them is that they both feel they didn't explore their options enough when they were young and attractive (they still are). It's a different problem than those faced by people who barely enjoyed romantic lives growing up. But for them, it turned out to be a big enough to end their marriage.

goodpoint 5y ago

> You are not lost, you are one of the 1%. Please don't dismiss OP so quickly. One person can very well be lost *because* they are in the 1%. Things like starting a career and putting your abilities to test can be a huge motivator. Once you reach such goals live can suddenly turn meaningless for many people.

gernb 5y ago

What's your age? I know several people between 55-60 that got hired at FAAMG companies