Sounds like you're heavily projecting. This post is literally the definition of projection. Just read your post over again and realize how toxic and demeaning a

Sounds like you're heavily projecting. This post is literally the definition of projection. Just read your post over again and realize how toxic and demeaning and unbearable you sound. Maybe look deeply into how much of an asshole your are, and then maybe that'll give you a clue why you hate your life. But to give real advice to you in a less flippant manner, start embracing who you are. You're going to end up in your 40s fantasizing about living a stereotypical and neurotypical extrovert life like a frat boy and constantly hating and rejecting people who nerdy and geeky only to realize how much time you wasted trying to be someone you aren't. You have people to hang out with. You just reject them because you hate yourself, you have always had a thing against awkward and nerdy people, even though that's who you are. Trust me, many people on the borderline of smart and cool during their highschool go through this phase. It's taking you till your 30s to learn this, but you will learn it soon. You will learn how superficial these labels are and how the only thing that matters is finding some people that care for you and that you care for them. You're literally self-hating by announcing your distaste for the stereotypical 'outcasts' of society. Because you would be in that group too. I actually hope you get what you want, a nice friend group full of 'normal' non-autistic, non-awkward, non-short, non-old, outgoing, and non-ugly people. I hope you get that dream and anything else you want- because you will quickly realize that it's not the answer. ~stolen slightly changed quote from Jim Carrey.