4 ms·

I would be curious to see how much you would need to spend to replicate all the services that large cities generally have for a typical upper middle class famil

I would be curious to see how much you would need to spend to replicate all the services that large cities generally have for a typical upper middle class family. Local school probably doesn't have AP classes or anyone to meaningfully help with SAT prep. Or a computer science teacher. Got to hire tutors to do all that or send the kids to boarding school. Probably cannot get childcare. Got to import a nanny if you want full time childcare. And the nanny will need a car as nothing is in walking distance. Airports. You are going to spend a bunch extra flying out of whatever little regional airport is nearby. No low cost carriers in these small towns. Then there are the things that cannot be replicated, like ambulances: https://www.nbcnews.com/health/health-care/there-s-shortage-volunteer-ems-workers-ambulances-rural-america-n1068556 https://www.nbcnews.com/health/health-care/there-s-shortage-...

deleted 5y ago
[deleted]
gedy 5y ago
You seem to be trying to replicate a dual income urban lifestyle in the country. If you’re willing to live in rural areas do your kids really need to go to an in person school for all this information and tutoring? Do both parents need to work full-time to even require daycare?
- watwut 5y ago
  Rural should not imply "homeschooled".
- MattGaiser 5y ago
  I am not sure what to think of homeschooling. I was homeschooled until grade 8 and even after did a ton of courses online. Worked out great for me, but only because I am not a social person. I am not certain that I can be lonely as long as I have an internet connection, as I spent days by myself in university. How that worked out for some other people I know was much more mixed.
vorpalhex 5y ago
If you are choosing to live in one of these places, there is probably someone in your household not working who is going to mind the kids and help engage in homemaking. You will also find you have neighbors in similar situations who likely run a small group daycare operation for a bit of extra cash. Yes, your kid is not going to have as many teachers. They will also have far, far, far fewer peers and smaller classroom sizes. They will get more attention from the teachers. If your kid wants to do AP or SAT prep, you will find your local school can run the course after hours. You can probably hire one of their teachers.
- Day1 5y ago
  Absolutely true, I would argue the advantage of having greater attention from knowledgeable adults in a small town far outweigh the benefits from living in a city.
- watwut 5y ago
  Otherwise said, if you want to move there, the wife is expected to stay at home and accept no possibility of getting job or career for much longer time then it would be otherwise.
  - vorpalhex 5y ago
    There is no reason a male of the house can't be the homemaker. Even if he's the one working some of the land, that will likely be before the kids are really awake. You may also have an elderly parent or an older child who can do the work. Remember, with enough land you can give family members their own house, yard and driveway. It's important to not get stuck in old ways of thinking.
    - chmod600 5y ago
      "It's important to not get stuck in old ways of thinking." Great comment, but I think you mean stuck in new/urban ways of thinking. It probably seems crazy to someone in a rural town that parents would spend all their time working to afford childcare so they don't have to interact with their own children.
almost_usual 5y ago
As someone who grew up in a farm town of 3k and went to public schools my entire life it was fine but boring. I’d argue the boring aspect either results in kids trying harder at school or getting into trouble. I had no problems getting a high paying engineering job in SV and eventually buying a home in the Peninsula. I’d argue some kids in boring rural areas have more motivation to learn than ones who grow up with everything they need.
qdog 5y ago
I grew up in a small, dying town in Texas. There was still Ambulance service, so really depends on how small (<800 people). There are generally no jobs, so there are plenty of childcare providers from other young parents (who probably grew up there) to retirees who need some extra cash. Quality of childcare is of course, variable. Airport travel is probably only a good option for remote workers, I don't think I took a commercial flight till I was over 18. Most of the stable jobs are government related (town/county governement and school teachers) and often awarded via nepotism. Land is cheap, but winds of 50MPH are the nromal, tornadoes, snow, heat, dust. I don't think I could ever go back to living there permanently, and it will only get worse during economic downturns. I will also note that big box stores are probably detrimental to tax revenues, but my memory of the smaller stores was high prices and low inventory. We'd often drive 70 miles to the bigger city, as it was cheaper, wider selection. Nowadays I'm sure it's mostly Amazon or the big drive to Walmart, and no local store is going to change that. The Sears and Motgomery WArd catalogues were the general shopping tools, most of thee places I knew of peaked in the 50's, surged a bit in 80's with the Oil Boom, and then went back to dying.

deleted 5y ago

[deleted]

gedy 5y ago

You seem to be trying to replicate a dual income urban lifestyle in the country. If you’re willing to live in rural areas do your kids really need to go to an in person school for all this information and tutoring? Do both parents need to work full-time to even require daycare?

watwut 5y ago
Rural should not imply "homeschooled".
MattGaiser 5y ago
I am not sure what to think of homeschooling. I was homeschooled until grade 8 and even after did a ton of courses online. Worked out great for me, but only because I am not a social person. I am not certain that I can be lonely as long as I have an internet connection, as I spent days by myself in university. How that worked out for some other people I know was much more mixed.

vorpalhex 5y ago

If you are choosing to live in one of these places, there is probably someone in your household not working who is going to mind the kids and help engage in homemaking. You will also find you have neighbors in similar situations who likely run a small group daycare operation for a bit of extra cash. Yes, your kid is not going to have as many teachers. They will also have far, far, far fewer peers and smaller classroom sizes. They will get more attention from the teachers. If your kid wants to do AP or SAT prep, you will find your local school can run the course after hours. You can probably hire one of their teachers.

Day1 5y ago
Absolutely true, I would argue the advantage of having greater attention from knowledgeable adults in a small town far outweigh the benefits from living in a city.
watwut 5y ago
Otherwise said, if you want to move there, the wife is expected to stay at home and accept no possibility of getting job or career for much longer time then it would be otherwise.
- vorpalhex 5y ago
  There is no reason a male of the house can't be the homemaker. Even if he's the one working some of the land, that will likely be before the kids are really awake. You may also have an elderly parent or an older child who can do the work. Remember, with enough land you can give family members their own house, yard and driveway. It's important to not get stuck in old ways of thinking.
  - chmod600 5y ago
    "It's important to not get stuck in old ways of thinking." Great comment, but I think you mean stuck in new/urban ways of thinking. It probably seems crazy to someone in a rural town that parents would spend all their time working to afford childcare so they don't have to interact with their own children.

almost_usual 5y ago

As someone who grew up in a farm town of 3k and went to public schools my entire life it was fine but boring. I’d argue the boring aspect either results in kids trying harder at school or getting into trouble. I had no problems getting a high paying engineering job in SV and eventually buying a home in the Peninsula. I’d argue some kids in boring rural areas have more motivation to learn than ones who grow up with everything they need.

qdog 5y ago

I grew up in a small, dying town in Texas. There was still Ambulance service, so really depends on how small (<800 people). There are generally no jobs, so there are plenty of childcare providers from other young parents (who probably grew up there) to retirees who need some extra cash. Quality of childcare is of course, variable. Airport travel is probably only a good option for remote workers, I don't think I took a commercial flight till I was over 18. Most of the stable jobs are government related (town/county governement and school teachers) and often awarded via nepotism. Land is cheap, but winds of 50MPH are the nromal, tornadoes, snow, heat, dust. I don't think I could ever go back to living there permanently, and it will only get worse during economic downturns. I will also note that big box stores are probably detrimental to tax revenues, but my memory of the smaller stores was high prices and low inventory. We'd often drive 70 miles to the bigger city, as it was cheaper, wider selection. Nowadays I'm sure it's mostly Amazon or the big drive to Walmart, and no local store is going to change that. The Sears and Motgomery WArd catalogues were the general shopping tools, most of thee places I knew of peaked in the 50's, surged a bit in 80's with the Oil Boom, and then went back to dying.