I should have added "attention and validation" as these are normal social things that we all need. Wanting these are not bad, it's just how we get them that can

I should have added "attention and validation" as these are normal social things that we all need. Wanting these are not bad, it's just how we get them that can sometimes be unhealthy. Is it possible your wife has lower self-esteem? It becomes a vicious circle, as you seek ways to increase it using the best ways you know, until you become self-aware enough to step out of the pattern. Does she have opportunities to be praised by other women for non-material or visual qualities? We all need this.