It was a strange mix. She was a very loving mother when I was a kid. She told me that I was a wanted child (not an accident), and that I was the most important

It was a strange mix. She was a very loving mother when I was a kid. She told me that I was a wanted child (not an accident), and that I was the most important person in her life. I have good memories from when I was 4 to 8 years old. Things took a turn for the worse when her mental illness surfaced, but it was always like, she really wanted to be a good parent and she really tried her best, but the mental illness made that difficult/impossible.