6 ms·

How to put bad habits to good use

58 points by lxm 5y ago

bayesian_horse 5y ago
This reminds me of the TV Show "Dexter".
automatic6131 5y ago
I hate the guardian so much. They can phrase ideas that I agree with in the most irritating way possible. Perhaps I should put that hate to good use?
- iovrthoughtthis 5y ago
  yeah, welcome it and ask "hey, thanks for popping by. why are you here though? im not sure theres anything i need protecting from, so what are you trying to protect me from?"
- benlumen 5y ago
  I don't click Guardian links and haven't done for years, even if I'm interested. It's gross.
  - automatic6131 5y ago
    I need to achieve this level of zen
  - tehnub 5y ago
    I’m guessing this is a reaction to their opinion pieces. I find their investigative reporting to be top quality.
    - 0xdeadb00f 5y ago
      Agreed.
- account-5 5y ago
  Practically every guardian piece depresses me, every subject they write about has to be twisted somehow to infer systemic this or that, even when not actually relevant. It's a shame really because like others commented here I think their investigative pieces would be good otherwise, they just ruin everything.
  - pknight 5y ago
    I agree, if you had to get a team together with the sole purpose of crushing people's spirit and grinding people down with opinions while appearing to be somewhat wellmeaning, the guardian would be a stellar example of that.
etripe 5y ago
Aside from the usual Guardian dalliance with identity politics, this article comes across as either nihilistic, or making the case for contentment with what we've got rather than to strive to improve oneself. The latter is perhaps what we collectively need to hear as an alternative to the productivity porn, but it's a depressingly low bar to me. All of these can be true at the same time: * holding yourself to a standard * striving to better yourself * caring about your own mental health * giving yourself time to rest/recover * being kind to yourself when it comes to past failures The article goes a bit too far with lowering expectations.
- iovrthoughtthis 5y ago
  our discourse often seems to lack the nuance, that two opposing ideas can (and should) be held in our heads at the same time. that we should hold ourselves in unconditional positive regard and that we can strive for more imo, this article is attempting to push the pendulum back towards the positive regard as, and i would agree, the author feels that were too far into striving
- bobthechef 5y ago
  > the usual Guardian dalliance with identity politics I especially liked the "people who live in bodies" bit (or "black bodies"!). Your body is not a house that some "real you" inhabits. You are your body. You are bodily. That's part of what it means to be human is a bodily creature. There is more to you than the bodily (pace materialists whose view of the bodily itself is deficient and mechanistic even as strictly bodily), but it is a part of you. I don't know where this strange, almost dualistic "othering" of one's body (to borrow their term) comes from, but it does square with the gnostic hatred of the body and the physical world that is in vogue. Perhaps a combination of envy and an overreaction to the cult of the body.
abagheri43 5y ago
thenerdhead 5y ago
What happened to a little tough love now and then? If we just give excuses or write off known methods that work as “compassion” or “self love”, what even drives someone to make a significant change in their lives? When I was bigger, it wasn’t being kind to myself that helped me lose weight. It wasn’t holding those bad habits either. When I was lazier, it wasn’t being mindless and disorganized that helped me do more. When I was determined, it wasn’t telling myself “it’ll be okay” if I didn’t follow through with a goal. I accepted the fact that I was overweight, lazy, and not motivated. Instead of saying “that’s okay, you’re human”, I made drastic change to the ideal version I wanted to be. This isn’t productivity porn, this is just reality. I’m either getting old and out of touch or this article just doesn’t make sense to me at all.
- colechristensen 5y ago
  People are blocked by different things to overcome personal obstacles. For some people fear and anxiety of making progress or failing is the blocker and they need the linked kind of advice. You didn’t have this experience, which is fine as long as you realize your path to success isn’t going to work for everybody.
  - thenerdhead 5y ago
    Right but the article is quite contradictory of "mindfulness" for example. > We can do the same by giving ourselves permission to feel uncomfortable things such as sadness or anxiety, giving them time and space to occur, rather than always chasing them away with busyness, booze or digital distraction. and > Mindfulness is not a mental health panacea – despite new Nice guidance suggesting that mindfulness should be recommended before medication for depression. Instead, be more mindless. “You don’t want to be mindful every single second,” says Biswas-Diener, who also studies mindfulness. Is it for or against mindfulness? I can't tell.
    - theklr 5y ago
      It’s against the commodification of mindfulness/wellness. See girlboss/hustle culture. Unfortunately our society oversimplifies to the point becomes another marketing tactic.
JadoJodo 5y ago
I've had an adage that I remind myself of occasionally: "It's OK to struggle, as long as you do struggle." This can apply to losing weight, balancing work/life, making time to read, etc. I think it's a good balance between "It's not OK to struggle, and you need to be perfect every time." and "It's not OK to struggle (ever), and you just need to accept that you can't do it.". This article (and others I've seen like it) seems to fully embrace the very bottom end of that scale.
- ehnto 5y ago
  I think that aligns well with recognizing that it's not a dichotomy of success and failure anyway, it's a vast spectrum of outcomes and possibilities where the majority are varying types of progress.
keyboardCowBoy 5y ago
This is hog wash. Also They had to sprinkle bad things about white Europeans.
Pigalowda 5y ago
To me this long-winded and unintentionally abrasive piece reads as confirmation bias to nihilists and hedonists. Misery loves company I guess.

58 points by lxm 5y ago

This reminds me of the TV Show "Dexter".

I hate the guardian so much. They can phrase ideas that I agree with in the most irritating way possible. Perhaps I should put that hate to good use?

iovrthoughtthis 5y ago
yeah, welcome it and ask "hey, thanks for popping by. why are you here though? im not sure theres anything i need protecting from, so what are you trying to protect me from?"
benlumen 5y ago
I don't click Guardian links and haven't done for years, even if I'm interested. It's gross.
- automatic6131 5y ago
  I need to achieve this level of zen
- tehnub 5y ago
  I’m guessing this is a reaction to their opinion pieces. I find their investigative reporting to be top quality.
  - 0xdeadb00f 5y ago
    Agreed.
account-5 5y ago
Practically every guardian piece depresses me, every subject they write about has to be twisted somehow to infer systemic this or that, even when not actually relevant. It's a shame really because like others commented here I think their investigative pieces would be good otherwise, they just ruin everything.
- pknight 5y ago
  I agree, if you had to get a team together with the sole purpose of crushing people's spirit and grinding people down with opinions while appearing to be somewhat wellmeaning, the guardian would be a stellar example of that.

etripe 5y ago

Aside from the usual Guardian dalliance with identity politics, this article comes across as either nihilistic, or making the case for contentment with what we've got rather than to strive to improve oneself. The latter is perhaps what we collectively need to hear as an alternative to the productivity porn, but it's a depressingly low bar to me. All of these can be true at the same time: * holding yourself to a standard * striving to better yourself * caring about your own mental health * giving yourself time to rest/recover * being kind to yourself when it comes to past failures The article goes a bit too far with lowering expectations.

iovrthoughtthis 5y ago
our discourse often seems to lack the nuance, that two opposing ideas can (and should) be held in our heads at the same time. that we should hold ourselves in unconditional positive regard and that we can strive for more imo, this article is attempting to push the pendulum back towards the positive regard as, and i would agree, the author feels that were too far into striving
bobthechef 5y ago
> the usual Guardian dalliance with identity politics I especially liked the "people who live in bodies" bit (or "black bodies"!). Your body is not a house that some "real you" inhabits. You are your body. You are bodily. That's part of what it means to be human is a bodily creature. There is more to you than the bodily (pace materialists whose view of the bodily itself is deficient and mechanistic even as strictly bodily), but it is a part of you. I don't know where this strange, almost dualistic "othering" of one's body (to borrow their term) comes from, but it does square with the gnostic hatred of the body and the physical world that is in vogue. Perhaps a combination of envy and an overreaction to the cult of the body.

abagheri43 5y ago

thenerdhead 5y ago

What happened to a little tough love now and then? If we just give excuses or write off known methods that work as “compassion” or “self love”, what even drives someone to make a significant change in their lives? When I was bigger, it wasn’t being kind to myself that helped me lose weight. It wasn’t holding those bad habits either. When I was lazier, it wasn’t being mindless and disorganized that helped me do more. When I was determined, it wasn’t telling myself “it’ll be okay” if I didn’t follow through with a goal. I accepted the fact that I was overweight, lazy, and not motivated. Instead of saying “that’s okay, you’re human”, I made drastic change to the ideal version I wanted to be. This isn’t productivity porn, this is just reality. I’m either getting old and out of touch or this article just doesn’t make sense to me at all.

colechristensen 5y ago
People are blocked by different things to overcome personal obstacles. For some people fear and anxiety of making progress or failing is the blocker and they need the linked kind of advice. You didn’t have this experience, which is fine as long as you realize your path to success isn’t going to work for everybody.
- thenerdhead 5y ago
  Right but the article is quite contradictory of "mindfulness" for example. > We can do the same by giving ourselves permission to feel uncomfortable things such as sadness or anxiety, giving them time and space to occur, rather than always chasing them away with busyness, booze or digital distraction. and > Mindfulness is not a mental health panacea – despite new Nice guidance suggesting that mindfulness should be recommended before medication for depression. Instead, be more mindless. “You don’t want to be mindful every single second,” says Biswas-Diener, who also studies mindfulness. Is it for or against mindfulness? I can't tell.
  - theklr 5y ago
    It’s against the commodification of mindfulness/wellness. See girlboss/hustle culture. Unfortunately our society oversimplifies to the point becomes another marketing tactic.

JadoJodo 5y ago

I've had an adage that I remind myself of occasionally: "It's OK to struggle, as long as you do struggle." This can apply to losing weight, balancing work/life, making time to read, etc. I think it's a good balance between "It's not OK to struggle, and you need to be perfect every time." and "It's not OK to struggle (ever), and you just need to accept that you can't do it.". This article (and others I've seen like it) seems to fully embrace the very bottom end of that scale.

ehnto 5y ago
I think that aligns well with recognizing that it's not a dichotomy of success and failure anyway, it's a vast spectrum of outcomes and possibilities where the majority are varying types of progress.

keyboardCowBoy 5y ago

This is hog wash. Also They had to sprinkle bad things about white Europeans.

Pigalowda 5y ago

To me this long-winded and unintentionally abrasive piece reads as confirmation bias to nihilists and hedonists. Misery loves company I guess.