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> How do I get over constant failure? Constant failure? You are highly compensated and have a mortgage for a house, presumably in a very high cost of living ar

by rkk3 5y ago

> How do I get over constant failure? Constant failure? You are highly compensated and have a mortgage for a house, presumably in a very high cost of living area. It seems like you are an insecure overachiever and need to reframe things. > My manager left a few weeks after I started, my onboarding buddy has been absent, and the fear has started creeping in again that I'm alone and can't hack it in this high performing team. That doesn't sound like a high performing team. Stop putting dysfunctional startups on a pedestal and denigrating yourself.

burnoutgal 5y ago
Having a mortgage isn't an accomplishment, it's a liability. It would be expensive and stressful to downsize our biggest expense, and unexpected repairs blew a huge hole in our household budget. I'm well-compensated for now, but how long can I realistically keep it up? The team hasn't done a great job supporting me, but they deliver on their commitments and the individual team members are extremely competent.
- rkk3 5y ago
  > unexpected repairs blew a huge hole in our household budget. Yeah that's unfortunate, and maintenance & repairs can cancel out some of the price appreciation as well. But in general it sounds like you are doing extremely well personally and professionally and are going out of your way to tell yourself stories about how things are going wrong. > The team hasn't done a great job supporting me, but they deliver on their commitments and the individual team members are extremely competent. Your lack of onboarding reflects extremely poorly on them & their process, not yourself. They made let's say at this point an 100k investment in you with what sounds like zero visibility & process. > I'm well-compensated for now, but how long can I realistically keep it up? I would probably just start looking for another job, "dream jobs" aren't always what they are cut out to be and there is no reason to tie yourself to this one. They will not be so sentimental.

by rkk3 5y ago

burnoutgal 5y ago

Having a mortgage isn't an accomplishment, it's a liability. It would be expensive and stressful to downsize our biggest expense, and unexpected repairs blew a huge hole in our household budget. I'm well-compensated for now, but how long can I realistically keep it up? The team hasn't done a great job supporting me, but they deliver on their commitments and the individual team members are extremely competent.

rkk3 5y ago
> unexpected repairs blew a huge hole in our household budget. Yeah that's unfortunate, and maintenance & repairs can cancel out some of the price appreciation as well. But in general it sounds like you are doing extremely well personally and professionally and are going out of your way to tell yourself stories about how things are going wrong. > The team hasn't done a great job supporting me, but they deliver on their commitments and the individual team members are extremely competent. Your lack of onboarding reflects extremely poorly on them & their process, not yourself. They made let's say at this point an 100k investment in you with what sounds like zero visibility & process. > I'm well-compensated for now, but how long can I realistically keep it up? I would probably just start looking for another job, "dream jobs" aren't always what they are cut out to be and there is no reason to tie yourself to this one. They will not be so sentimental.