3 ms·
Because its a deeply personal piece of information for many people. Personally, Id rather have my medical history available to the public than my personal weal
by tagoregrtst 5y ago
Because its a deeply personal piece of information for many people.
Personally, Id rather have my medical history available to the public than my personal wealth or income (and Im loath to give that up!). No one except my wife knows how much I make. In the case of my parents, my mom has never known how much money my dad makes.
They may seem strange to you, it may seem barbaric or backwards. That’s irrelevant - I’m firmly entrenched in this position and wont help you release this data (through my vote, and legal lawsuits, clearly).
You can’t dismiss me as an eccentric American behind the more enlightened Europeans - Im not American, I am and grew up in Europe, I just live in the US.
Nor am I or did I grow up rich. Growing up, my dad whenever my dad was doing the bills he joked he was feeding a blackhole (debt). We never knew how big this hole was, but we knew where it came from - even a hard working engineer has a steep financial hill when you’re from a poor country.
You really must understand ours is a deep seated difference in points of view. My mom has never asked how much my dad made, my dad has yet to tell her. My mom had a vague idea how much she could spend (her guesstimate was very good) my dad never enquired what she spent money on. He himself never spent any money except on us. The result is they never fought over money, the most common marital problem (I guarantee you this. Both my parents would rather be paupers than put money between their relationship - they are both very stoic and devoted to each other). I doubt this would have been the case had my mom ever displayed any interest in money.
So what does making my tax returns or my salary (probably the lowest among my colleagues) publicly available mean to us? It means inviting strangers into our intimate space, more intimate than the fact that I have a rare auto immune disease Ill share with a random person on the internet (anonymized, of course :P ).
You see, there are people who view this information not merely as a means to a more just society (whatever that means anymore) but as a very intimate part of their family life. Just because some cannot see that doesn’t mean it isn't real.
- paulryanrogers 5y agoWhy consider it intimate data? Fear it will cause spousal resentment, impact future offers, being targeted by gold diggers or grifters? Wealth tied to identity?
- ramphastidae 5y agoDid you read the comment you are replying to? The answer to your question is literally the entire content of the comment.
- paulryanrogers 5y agoMaybe I'm just dense but it wasn't clear the motivation for keeping the info secret. It seems implied that fear of spousal conflict was involved.
- ramphastidae 5y agoI see. Sorry for my snark. My understanding was that they feel money has a deeply corrupting influence on relationships, and credits the strength of their parents marriage with the fact that they both made a clear effort to avoid taking about money (while still being responsible with it). I don’t think that they are saying that making tax returns public will directly cause more spousal conflict, but it will cause more general corruption of relationships across the board. I can certainly see that. In my experience, there are very few people who respond appropriately when they learn what someone makes. Rarely is it: “oh, good for them, anyway, moving on …” Most of the time, it’s unhelpful and toxic commentary about whether the person is overpaid/spoiled/poor with money/a sucker or whatever depending on their circumstances. I wish it wasn’t that way but that has been my experience.
- tagoregrtst 5y agoTo summarize my comment, because something as mundane as money is more likely to enter (and therefore effect) into my relationships with others when we know how much we make. Its hard to be friends with someone who you know makes twice (or half) what you make. But there are many people who I think are cool and would want to have a relationship with that make a lot more/less than I. Thats also a reason why modesty in our behavior is important - the wealthier person in a relationship shouldn't keep proposing things that are financially difficult for the other
- 5y ago