I have to commit to something within the context of an interpersonal relationship of intense, nigh existential importance to me, fight to get it done, and to ad

I have to commit to something within the context of an interpersonal relationship of intense, nigh existential importance to me, fight to get it done, and to admit with as much dispassion as possible when I can't do it for some reason or another. That's what seems to work. We tend to be attached but uncommitted, when we need to committed but detached. Otherwise the emotional angst of failure eats away at efforts we know to be weak.