5 ms·

6 years sober here. Most of the advice so far wouldn't have been much help when I first stopped drinking. It's honestly hard, and the first year or two won't b

6 years sober here. Most of the advice so far wouldn't have been much help when I first stopped drinking. It's honestly hard, and the first year or two won't be great. Boardgames and cafes are boring as fuck compared to getting drunk. Sure, rafting and cycling and other examples might fill up a Sunday afternoon, but they don't work for Friday night. Over time you adjust. I've made a few friends that don't drink. I have others that I can go out with and they don't mind me not drinking. At some point you realize that you won't be having as much fun as getting drunk. But your life will be better in other aspects, and that will make it worth it.

kaiju0 5y ago
You are borrowing joy. It sure is hard not to do it though.
tluyben2 5y ago
> At some point you realize that you won't be having as much fun as getting drunk. Did you move away or you stayed in the same place? I notice that changing things radically helps a lot; I moved 1000s of kms which allows to reboot. If I would've stayed, well, all people from my previous life live there still and the same bars and other 'fun' is there still. When I go back for a visit, even a week, it is party time then first night and all nights after that until groggy and nauseated on the plane home. I don't enjoy that anymore as I like my work and my hobbies and most of them need a clear and responsive mind, not a cotton ball and depression. My current group of friends mostly drink socially but don't mind to have people to do fun stuff with that do not. So for me a Friday of not drinking at all(which are most Friday nights of the year), I cook pizza in my woodoven, cook food, make snacks and have a movie or game night etc. My mates get slightly legless but we all have a lot of fun and I am mostly busy with preparing things so time flies with something I enjoy.
clarge1120 5y ago
This is sober and mature advice. There is simply no easy answer to the question: how do I break a bad habit and keep the benefits? Vices have benefits. The OP took the first step already: admitting that getting drunk is a bad habit. Breaking a bad habit is like choosing to learn to walk all over again: lots of bumps on the head, and a not a few failures, but eventually you learn to walk again.
gravlaks 5y ago
I play FPS games, and I perform worse when I'm drinking, and I get sleepy. So for me it works better to stay sober. Actually I prefer to stay sober even while watching a show, because I don't like the dizzy feeling, unless if drinking socially.

kaiju0 5y ago

You are borrowing joy. It sure is hard not to do it though.

tluyben2 5y ago

> At some point you realize that you won't be having as much fun as getting drunk. Did you move away or you stayed in the same place? I notice that changing things radically helps a lot; I moved 1000s of kms which allows to reboot. If I would've stayed, well, all people from my previous life live there still and the same bars and other 'fun' is there still. When I go back for a visit, even a week, it is party time then first night and all nights after that until groggy and nauseated on the plane home. I don't enjoy that anymore as I like my work and my hobbies and most of them need a clear and responsive mind, not a cotton ball and depression. My current group of friends mostly drink socially but don't mind to have people to do fun stuff with that do not. So for me a Friday of not drinking at all(which are most Friday nights of the year), I cook pizza in my woodoven, cook food, make snacks and have a movie or game night etc. My mates get slightly legless but we all have a lot of fun and I am mostly busy with preparing things so time flies with something I enjoy.

clarge1120 5y ago

This is sober and mature advice. There is simply no easy answer to the question: how do I break a bad habit and keep the benefits? Vices have benefits. The OP took the first step already: admitting that getting drunk is a bad habit. Breaking a bad habit is like choosing to learn to walk all over again: lots of bumps on the head, and a not a few failures, but eventually you learn to walk again.

gravlaks 5y ago

I play FPS games, and I perform worse when I'm drinking, and I get sleepy. So for me it works better to stay sober. Actually I prefer to stay sober even while watching a show, because I don't like the dizzy feeling, unless if drinking socially.