> failing a partner in their hour (well, decade) of need Genuine question here. What do you mean when you talk about "failing a partner"? It seems like everyon

> failing a partner in their hour (well, decade) of need Genuine question here. What do you mean when you talk about "failing a partner"? It seems like everyone in this type of relationship hesitates to leave because they think they'll damage the other person. It doesn't sound from what you've written that your partner was doing so well when you were with them. Have you considered that maybe part of the depression was caused by their relationship with you? (Obviously I'm not saying that is the case, but reading your post, you seem to be of the opinion that your relationship was a good thing for your ex-partner.)