Your past never leaves you. You just learn to live with it. You change somehow, so that changed version can live with whatever it was. After a painful chapter

Your past never leaves you. You just learn to live with it. You change somehow, so that changed version can live with whatever it was. After a painful chapter in my life, I fully changed my social circle. I kept in touch with a very few people who are "good" people, and who are emotionally mature. I avoided reunions, get-togethers, picnics, etc. Doing this, I also punished those who were in the middle- not the close ones or the ones who aided the bad things in my life. Multiple people have talked about doing something. I would recommend that very highly. "A deep life is a good life." Whatever you do, or whatever you are interested to do, dive into that. Spend serious time for getting good at it. Practice deliberately. Level up. Doing this will benefit you in multiple unforseen ways. Not just with your immediate problem. For me, it was Mathematical Physics, poetry and literature in general, reading History very carefully. It made my life good. Meet new people. At your own pace. Get to know them. Form new connections. Changing geographical scenario is helpful. I happened to move into a megacity at that time- the people of where matched well with my personality. Having someone to share your trauma who knows you closely and who has seen it all unfold is really valuable. Finally, give it time. Be patient. Don't judge yourself. Be open. What you shouldn't do- 1. Don't doomscroll social media. 2. Don't let alcohol consumption go over a certain threshold. You could ask me questions. I will monitor my comment and answer if you want.