I can totally relate to your experiences. Writting about myself and what seems to have helped me. Have been on medications for two years (getting off of them

I can totally relate to your experiences. Writting about myself and what seems to have helped me. Have been on medications for two years (getting off of them now), and in therapy for a year. Likewise, I had (or have) troubles with feeling stagnated/unmotivated after bursts of productivity and motivation. The key insight was that creativity and productivity does not come without cost. I used to overwork myself and my body. After "feeding" the intellectual part of me, the other parts became "hungry". The solution for me is to have breaks, even when I am in the state of flow while doing something productive, and use that energy to work on the dull activities that are required to keep me healthy - physically and psychologically. The stream of consciousness style of journaling helps me as well - it helps the root cause of my bad feelings show themselves, sometimes in a subtle way. What you may want to have a look at is Active Imagination[1], it comes from Jungian analytical psychology. I find it really helpful. Good luck! [1] https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Active_imagination https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Active_imagination