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I realise you didn’t post this looking for advice (and I apologise if this is unwelcome), but if I can relate one small thing from my own personal mental health

I realise you didn’t post this looking for advice (and I apologise if this is unwelcome), but if I can relate one small thing from my own personal mental health nadir: Walk. Outdoors. In the greenest place you can find. No, it won’t change anything that you’ve been through, but it really will help you to quiet everything for a small chunk of time to let your mind get a rest from it. Please don’t ever think you’re inadequate. No-one, not even you, as any idea what might be waiting in your future :-)

abzug 5y ago
No need to apologize. Thanks for the help and kind words.
sfjailbird 5y ago
To add to this great advice, if you feel lazy to start, get a good audio book and listen as you walk. It becomes a kind of reward for going for a walk, you get a chapter or two of a great book.
- mdip 5y ago
  I'll second this advice: I can't walk alone when I'm depressed. The quieting effect of being alone just causes my mind to go crazy with all of my problems. An audio book at that time, however, is a great solution. Audio books, for me, can't occupy my entire mind. I can't sit and listen to an audio book. At the same time, they occupy enough of my mind that I can't do other mentally intense things and pay attention to the book at the same time. I had used them for driving, yard work, and other boring tasks to quiet the noise in my head and the feeling of boredom[0] that the task occupies. When walking with a good audio book, I can observe the world without the noise of my circumstances and it really is a peaceful exercise. [0] For me, boredom drives depression.
  - johndubchak 5y ago
    I would agree. The saying, "Idle hands are the devils playground" can be appropriated as, "An idle mind is the fertile soil of the depressed." Although the reality is the mind is anything but idle for those predisposed to depression. The rumination, negative thought patterns and self-critical thoughts are worse than a prison sentence of solitary confinement. For those who may not understand this, imagine standing over a 5 year old constantly berating them, in a horrifically negative way, for every action they take, good or bad. Now imagine the effects of that over years or decades.
greggman3 5y ago
> Walk. Outdoors. In the greenest place you can find. Then my allergies will flair up and I'll have a miserable 1-2 days of recovery and be hating life. No thanks
uid-nobody 5y ago
I think going alone for a walk is a really bad idea/advice. I've always felt way worse after doing that because there is nothing to distract it so you just chew yourself up or at least that's how I do it.
- mec31 5y ago
  Just some minor pushback. When walking, ‘look at chimneys’. There is something to be said for enforcing an uplifted posture, plus engaging with the light. Honestly, it makes a difference!

abzug 5y ago

No need to apologize. Thanks for the help and kind words.

sfjailbird 5y ago

To add to this great advice, if you feel lazy to start, get a good audio book and listen as you walk. It becomes a kind of reward for going for a walk, you get a chapter or two of a great book.

mdip 5y ago
I'll second this advice: I can't walk alone when I'm depressed. The quieting effect of being alone just causes my mind to go crazy with all of my problems. An audio book at that time, however, is a great solution. Audio books, for me, can't occupy my entire mind. I can't sit and listen to an audio book. At the same time, they occupy enough of my mind that I can't do other mentally intense things and pay attention to the book at the same time. I had used them for driving, yard work, and other boring tasks to quiet the noise in my head and the feeling of boredom[0] that the task occupies. When walking with a good audio book, I can observe the world without the noise of my circumstances and it really is a peaceful exercise. [0] For me, boredom drives depression.
- johndubchak 5y ago
  I would agree. The saying, "Idle hands are the devils playground" can be appropriated as, "An idle mind is the fertile soil of the depressed." Although the reality is the mind is anything but idle for those predisposed to depression. The rumination, negative thought patterns and self-critical thoughts are worse than a prison sentence of solitary confinement. For those who may not understand this, imagine standing over a 5 year old constantly berating them, in a horrifically negative way, for every action they take, good or bad. Now imagine the effects of that over years or decades.

greggman3 5y ago

> Walk. Outdoors. In the greenest place you can find. Then my allergies will flair up and I'll have a miserable 1-2 days of recovery and be hating life. No thanks

uid-nobody 5y ago

I think going alone for a walk is a really bad idea/advice. I've always felt way worse after doing that because there is nothing to distract it so you just chew yourself up or at least that's how I do it.

mec31 5y ago
Just some minor pushback. When walking, ‘look at chimneys’. There is something to be said for enforcing an uplifted posture, plus engaging with the light. Honestly, it makes a difference!