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Thanks for your post, I think you put this really well. Many friends/parents/co-workers in my life have tried empathy alone, and the gap between their empathy
by jitl 5y ago
Thanks for your post, I think you put this really well.
Many friends/parents/co-workers in my life have tried empathy alone, and the gap between their empathy and my actions turned into conflict. The most frustrating is well meaning advice like “try using a planner” or “don’t procrastinate” (I’m struggling to come up with good examples here) which to me sounds almost tautological, like someone telling you “just remember not to forget”.
- totetsu 5y agoI have tens of planners scattered about．XD
- doubled112 5y agoJust use a list! Forgot the list... or where I put the list... or what list I needed...
- ryukafalz 5y agoI feel seen. Yes, scattered around my apartment are many many once-used attempts at organizational systems. The trouble is I start trying to use one to remember things and then forget about it!
- steveklabnik 5y agoFun trivia fact: bullet journaling was created to manage the inventor’s ADHD. I personally go back and forth on how helpful it is for me personally, but it’s been more so than many other strategies.
- spiralx 5y agoNow that does not surprise me at all. It's a nifty system that I didn't quite click with when I tried it, I should give it another go perhaps.
- opan 5y agoNotes.org file in emacs (or notes.txt in vim, or whatever similar thing) with different sections for different topics. Put everything in there. Sync it to other devices with syncthing. It's searchable, it's everywhere. I think that's a lot safer than dealing with a physical notebook or planner.
- 1_player 5y agoTrying to edit and sync a plain text file across iOS, Linux and Windows is such an effort every dozen times I've tried doing so I've lost motivation halfway.
- opan 5y agoI don't have any iOS devices, but in my comment I recommended a specific piece of software ("Syncthing" is the actual name), and I can assure you it works well on the other operating systems you listed, as well as Android. If you want to edit the file in multiple places, I think Syncthing is pretty much the best option there is. If you plan to do all edits at the same device but just want to view it elsewhere, something like regularly copying the file to the others with rsync or sftp or whatever your preference is may be enough. I manage some files in syncthing while others are just backed up to a server regularly with rsync. The downside of the one-way copying approach is that you may end up with an old version on some machines at some point, or if you suddenly do want/need to edit on a different device, you then have two versions of the file to deal with. Syncthing is kinda like Dropbox, but it's free software and decentralized. I think it uses bittorrent to copy things between your devices. If you consider yourself forgetful, a more automated/background solution like Syncthing also has benefits over manually copying stuff. You can just read/edit your file as normal and it'll sync so long as the daemon is running.
- 1_player 5y agoSyncthing is cool, but doesn't work on iOS. I mean, AFAIK it works but not in background, which makes it pretty useless.
- teucris 5y agoThe thing that constantly amazes me is that for many people, keeping a planner or staying organized aren’t that difficult. I am very effective and have good follow through, and I thought the hard work I had been putting in was what everyone did. Turns out I had ADHD and I was working over-time to keep up with what most people have as a base skill in my industry.
- BeFlatXIII 5y agoAdvice like that is genuinely useful: it allows you to flip a mental switch to throw all future advice from such a person straight to the trash. The one time I’ve had such advice turn out to be useful was when keeping a diary for track forgetfulness. The instructions were that if you forgot to log your memory for a week, then write that in once you remembered to journal again. That being given as an explicit instruction gave a signal that there was thought put behind the advice rather than spreading generic self-help advice.
- bratwurst3000 5y agoTracking my distraction was a big gamechanger for me. On my desk there is a little block with lines marking everytime i got distracted. After a while all those marks annoyed me very much because for every hour of task there were 20 or so lignes. Its visualizing my inatentiony. After a while it was like a game and those ligns negative points…. Now i have only 5 lignes per hour or so.
- medstrom 5y agoThank you for this tip, I'll apply it.