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> do not live up to expectations I think this might be the key. Have you heard this expression before: Disappointment = expectations - reality Unfortunately

by bsuvc 5y ago

> do not live up to expectations I think this might be the key. Have you heard this expression before: Disappointment = expectations - reality Unfortunately I'm not sure offhand where that saying originated, but I think it is true, at least for me. I'll spare you a lecture on it because, believe me, I'm no expert. But it is an expression I try to remind myself of from time to time to cope with people and things that might anger me.

matheusmoreira 5y ago
Nothing wrong with having expectations. Things are supposed to be good. Marriages are supposed to be forever. Justice is supposed to be done. Politicians are supposed to be honest. Governments are supposed to look out for us. Companies are supposed to provide good products and services. Obviously reality falls short of expectations no matter what we do. Enough disappointment will demoralize anyone. It will shatter their understanding of the world, their sense of right and wrong, of cause and effect. Cynicism is born when the disturbing realities become the new expectations. Cynicists expect the world to keep disappointing them.
- bsuvc 5y ago
  I didn't mean to say it was wrong to have expectations. I should have elaborated I guess, but tried to keep it short. I have high expectations for people and things that are important and close to me, and low expectations for things not as important to me or out of my control. It doesn't mean I don't care about some of those other things at all. It's just that I only have a limited amount of mental and emotional energy to spend, and I try to spend it wisely. Edit: hmm, maybe I'm sort of a cynic if I have low expectations. But I don't really think of myself that way. I try to be optimistic and focus on things I can do and not dwell on what I can't.
boltzmann_brain 5y ago
You will not be disappointed if you have no expectations.

by bsuvc 5y ago

matheusmoreira 5y ago

Nothing wrong with having expectations. Things are supposed to be good. Marriages are supposed to be forever. Justice is supposed to be done. Politicians are supposed to be honest. Governments are supposed to look out for us. Companies are supposed to provide good products and services. Obviously reality falls short of expectations no matter what we do. Enough disappointment will demoralize anyone. It will shatter their understanding of the world, their sense of right and wrong, of cause and effect. Cynicism is born when the disturbing realities become the new expectations. Cynicists expect the world to keep disappointing them.

bsuvc 5y ago
I didn't mean to say it was wrong to have expectations. I should have elaborated I guess, but tried to keep it short. I have high expectations for people and things that are important and close to me, and low expectations for things not as important to me or out of my control. It doesn't mean I don't care about some of those other things at all. It's just that I only have a limited amount of mental and emotional energy to spend, and I try to spend it wisely. Edit: hmm, maybe I'm sort of a cynic if I have low expectations. But I don't really think of myself that way. I try to be optimistic and focus on things I can do and not dwell on what I can't.

boltzmann_brain 5y ago

You will not be disappointed if you have no expectations.