Ask HN: Is there a simple online medical diagnosis tool?

I want to just plug in a bunch of symptoms, maybe like a Todo-style checklist, one symptom per line, and then say, 'Tell me what I have, doc'. e.g. - persistent cough - birth of daughter last year - cracked rib - cough getting worse - hurts to breath - excruciating to cough - pain worse on right - achy body - stiff joints - pain in ears when i wear a hat - pain when I sleep on my side - nose gets sore when i wear sunglasses I suspect it does not exist or cannot be found because: - it's illegal - AMA sued whoever tried it - it just can't be found, b/c of spam sites - it exists but you need to be a professional researcher/doctor/etc. to gain access. I will post the actual diagnosis tomorrow. This is not me, this is from the internet. A google will find it if you're curious.